Konosuba: A Rogue's Misadventures
by MasterSenpai1
Summary: It's a wonderful world! So why not share it? Follow the adventures of Koman Takeda, a 16-year old light novel enthusiast as he is thrusted into the world of Konosuba by a mysterious woman. As he navigates this wacky world, he soon learns to put aside his pride and expectations and simply enjoy the Wonderful world he is living in with all of its wacky people.
1. Chapter 1 Part 1

(Konosuba: A Rogue's Misadventures)

Volume 1: Surprise! It's a wonderful world after all.

Prologue:

A gentle breeze swayed the branches of the vibrantly blooming trees

The rising sun's streaks of light stretched out and touched every shadow

The fragrance of spring's soft and delightful presence filled the air

To the world, the splendor of new beginnings and new adventures sprang forth

To a mere lone teenage soul, the start of the same mundane routine

A boy who believed to be destined for great things-

-only to be reminded the dull, transience of his life

Yet another day going to and fro to the same static private academy

Yet another day seeking to evade the bleak and uneventful reality

Perhaps one fateful day, when he least expects it,

He might just get the one adventure that his heart truly desires…

Chapter 1: A Divine Intervention for This Adventurous Teen Part 1:

"I wonder what should I do tonight when I get home?"

Thought a boy on way home from school, waiting at a train station on the cusp of the sunset on a cool, breezy spring day in Japan.

The boy was of middling height stature and was skinny with a hint of physical fitness as evidence of his position on the track team.

His reading glasses highlighted his brown eyes, deep in thought of what to do once in his cluttered and confided room.

"The homework though is going to be a literal pain in the a** to deal with… The teacher spent half of the period yelling at Maou to stop throwing crap across the classroom, and the other half on his phone," thought the boy.

"Maybe I can just put off the homework and sneak in a couple of hours of playing with my online friends. I definitely know one of the guild members is like online 24/7. Just like how one of my classmates never shows up to class. Perhaps..."

The distant roar of a train horn interrupted this thought as the boy turned towards the direction of the train.

Coming down the subway stairs was a girl, carrying her books, pacing towards him.

She had a slim figure that was nicely complemented by the dark blue school uniform and a silver heart necklace wrapped around her neck.

Her blond hair glistened with sparkling radiance and tied back in a cute braided ponytail.

She had a well endowed chest region that bounced ever more slightly with every stride she took while making her way home.

The girl seemed to be frantically struggling to hold her books as she rushed towards the boy's direction.

As she dashed towards him, the girl tripped clumsily over herself and knocked the boy over, scattering the books and the two all over the train station floor.

The boy, laid on his back, looked up to see the beautiful blond school girl sprawled on top of his body in a position not unlike in those doujins he happens to skim through…

The girl's face began to flair furiously red with embarrassment and in a hasty manner recoiled backwards away from the boy's body.

"Are you alright?! I'm so sorry about bumping into you! I wasn't paying attention. I was in a rush to get home. Oh gosh, I'm going to be late!" said the girl in a frenzy of distress.

The boy began to pick up the books. "It's alright… No need to worry about it. Everyone gets a little nervous here and there after all. Here let me help you pick up your books," the boy casually remarked.

The girl's face quickly recovered from her state of panic from this kind-hearted gesture. She began to pick up her own books following suit after the kind stranger.

The two teenagers, while both reaching for the girl's mathematics book, placed their hands together, with the boy's right hand on top of the girl's soft delicate left hand.

"Oh god I actually holding a girl's hand! Ahem as natural of a cool guy like me…" he realized.

It felt so much better than the dating sims would have you believe.

"Wait! She's going to think I am some kind of weirdo if I keep holding her hand…" he thought as a flood of both happiness and morbid fear washed into the boy's mind.

The boy quickly removed his hand from the girl's hand and attempted to said "My bad miss. It wasn't on purpose! I swear!"

However, the words came out of his mouth as " My my ba ba bad mi mi miss!" as he continually stuttered the first three words to the absolute maximum.

The school girl's face swiftly changed from renewed embarrassment to a gentle smile as she softly chuckled at the boy's futile efforts to explain.

"I guess it's your turn to be the flustered one." the girl stated with a playful tone as she lightly tapped her finger on his nose.

The boy, still startled by touching her hand as well as her tapping on his nose, somewhat composed his frantic demeanor.

He scratched the back of his head replying, "Yeah… we're both a little jumpy today I suppose."

The two teenagers then awkwardly finished picking up the books and placed them into one orderly pile beside themselves.

"By the way, my name is Athena what's yours? I haven't gotten to ask you that yet since accidently bumping into you." asked the blond schoolgirl shyly.

"My name Takeda Koman, but you can just call me Koman (高慢). It's nice to meet you."

"Likewise. Thank you so much for helping me. I really appreciate it," the girl stated as she brushed her hair away from her face.

The boy replied proudly, " Don't sweat it. Any great guy like me would do the same. Especially for a pretty girl in need like you."

Both the boy and girl then blushed even more fervently shortly after he finished that reply.

They briefly made direct eye contact then swiftly turned their heads away from each other and towards their feet.

The girl then edged closer to the boy unexpectedly.

She noticed his spiky light black hair was combed upwards to the right side of his face and remarked playfully, "So you think I'm just a pretty damsel in distress?"

The boy turned to face directly into her radiantly beautiful yellow eyes that seemed to pierce his typical otaku soul.

Astonished by such a fearless move, he attempted to recompose his usual confident demeanor in response to the girl's playful inquiry.

But before he could so much as utter a single word, she giggled gently stating, " It's alright. I always did like a knight in shining armor coming to my aid when growing up."

And with that statement, the girl grasped firmly onto his collar of his buttoned shirt and pulled herself towards his face as she landed a delicate kiss onto his virgin cheek.

A rush of sheer joy, bewilderment, and utter surprise compounded upon the inexperienced heart of a city boy.

"This is the greatest day of my life! A beautiful schoolgirl gave me a kiss on the cheek!" he excitedly screamed in his mind.

As her delicate kiss left a trace of lipstick on his face and a trance of happiness on his soul, the world around him faded away.

Not the rustling of the wind, not the setting sun, and not even the loud horn of the distant oncoming train could draw Koman out of the dreamlike immersion he was in.

The girl slowly pulled back from her enchanting kiss on the boy's cheek.

She removed a silver heart necklace and carefully wrapped it around the boy's neck.

"Something to remember me by O' shining knight of mine." She spoke in an over-dramatic yet endearing tone.

"Perhaps this shining knight could return the favor sometime, perhaps my place tonight?" responded the boy as he played along.

The girl then exclaimed, "You DASTARDLY Rogue! Proposing to take this fair princess home alone so early without even a date planned. Clearly men these days have only one thing in mind…"

The two young teenagers then began to laugh jovially at the little fairy tale charade they just played in the middle of a public train station.

"I could get used to something nice like this. She reminds me of…" Pondered the boy whilst captivated by the soft laughter of the girl only inches away from him.

In his mind, an image of a sickly girl in a hospital bed holding a thumbs up appeared. She had a smile that outshone the gloomy atmosphere around her. It left a touch of splendor and pain.

The girl then casually remarked, "You know. I like you so much already. I almost feel bad about doing this to you now. Almost..."

"Doing what now?"

The schoolgirl suddenly pushed the boy with a surprisingly strength for such a slim girl, causing him to stumble and fall from the waiting platform and onto the tracks.

"OW! What the hell was that for!" shouted the boy in agony of land from a rough fall onto the train tracks.

The girl began to emit a vibrant yellowish red aura around herself as her yellow eyes and hair began to illuminate. Her clothing transformed into a black gown with streaks of gold running across it.

"Don't worry about it my _shining knight_. There's always a method to the madness. You're about to go on the adventure you have so desperately craved your whole life! In the meantime, I suggest you brace for impact because it's not going to be pretty. See you on the other side!" Declared the girl in an almost maniacal laughter.

The blonde girl then dissipated into cherry blossoms of light that were carried away in the night breeze.

The boy broke from his trance and recoiled in pain thinking, "What did she mean by the adventure I craved for? Also, brace for impact?" He then turned sideways to see an oncoming train only mere meters from him.

"That little…" The train brutally cut off this statement in a cruel twist of fate.

After to what seemed an eternity, I suddenly gasped for air and opened my eyes to see in front of me...

A girl abruptly blowing the party blower in her mouth and waving fans that sprouted water exclaiming.

"Huzzah! Welcome to the Afterlife!"

"Literally What the F**k…" I thought to myself.


	2. Chapter 1 Part 2

**Part 2:**

I was in a pure white room seating in a chair.

"Wait. Hold on. Where am I? Was that encounter with the blond girl just all a dream?" I thought.

Before I could make of what happened though…

Sitting across from me, there was a beautiful blue haired girl in a matching blue dress and wrapped in a light purple hagoromo.

Her light blue eyes were of similar luster as the blond girl's. They illuminated with a glow that seemly fitting of a heavenly being.

"Excuse me miss. My name is Takeda Koman. What exactly just happened to me just now?"

The cute girl in the blue dress threw aside her party props and leaned more intently towards me.

"Oh that, how can I put this simply?" She put her finger on the cusp of her lips.

"You were rejected by the only girl to ever noticed you and was run over by a train after finally achieving something for once in your otaku life. Does that cover it, Train Stain?"

She smirked with a deviously smug demeanor.

The nerve of this little brat! All potential love interest in this extremely cute girl just plummeted into the negatives. I angrily fumed in my adolescent mind.

"Hey don't call me that! I would have you know I do many wholesome things my life and am a very admirable and notable person amongst my peers." I countered.

"You do look a lot more attractive than the typical person that arrives here. Most of my clients look like they never have ran a kilometer or seen natural sunlight.

I instinctively blushed and betrayed my previous thought. After all, the girl sitting in front of me was extremely beautiful by anyone's standards and better yet complimented me.

"However…" the girl noted.

With the wave of her hand, a light novel, with my name written on it, dropped in her palm and she turned the cover towards my direction.

"Since when is reading light novels about busty demon girls living with one sexually dense guy in a dorm considered a wholesome activity?"

"Oh god! How did you get my treasured copy of My College Life with Demon Girls! Give it back!" I reached furiously at it to regain some semblance of dignity, but the girl pushed her foot in my face, rendering my efforts useless.

"I got that novel at an anime convention! It is even signed by the author! GIVE IT BACK!" I shouted frantically.

She laughed as I continued to struggle to take back my property back from her devious clutches.

"Wow. The fanservice of this novel is **FANTASTIC** for a romantically depraved boy like you! It's almost like the girls don't have clothes at all!" She remarked as she skimmed through the novel. "Plus, the characters and "plot" are so simple even someone like you would understand."

I then leaned back into my chair defeated after finally giving up on my dignity.

"Great. First brutally murdered. Then brutally humiliated. What's next?"

The girl tossed my light novel onto my lap and shifts into a more comfortable position in her chair with a more relaxed composure.

"About that. Apparently, you were murdered by a blond-haired girl who teleported shortly after she killed you. She emitted a radiant presence that not even I have seen before. Though I barely saw much, she is certainly different from your average japanese schoolgirl."

"I got that much you entitled little punk. I want to know who she was and why the hell she had to murder me!"

"Like I said Train Stain, I wasn't paying attention much to your little romantic scene with little Miss Killjoy. And even if I actually knew who she was or why she decided to pay attention to someone like you, I probably wouldn't bother to tell you." She stated in a disinterested manner.

Her attitude really agitated me with all of its aloof gestures, her nickname for me especially bugged me.

"Excuse me, managers of the heavens. Can I get another goddess? I don't think you got the right goddess for someone such as myself. This one is a bit dysfunctional. That would excellent, thank you." I mockingly asked towards the non-existent ceiling.

Her face slightly twitched at my mockery of her status, but failed to provoke her as much as I intended.

"Honestly, I wasn't even supposed to have you arrive here. There was some error in the soul processing and you just happened to end in my afterlife room. I don't get paid enough to work with people like you…"

Error? So, I was supposed to end up somewhere else? Weird. What did the blonde girl say again? See you on the other side? I pondered deeply.

"I see the angels of the afterlife aren't so heavenly afterall. Can you at least explain to me what's going happen now that I died?"

"Finally, I can move on. You know I got like 10 other NEETs to work through, Train Stain. Life of a goddess isn't easy you know!"

Goddess? This demon of a high-school girl is a goddess? Last time I checked, goddesses were graceful and loving beings, not prideful, uncaring pricks.

The girl rustled through the drawer right of her chair and brought out a script in front of her.

"Ahem. Congratulations otaku/neet/young japanese male! It seems that you died of premature and early death." The girl exclaimed in a bubbly voice.

"I am the divine water goddess Aqua! I'm your guide through the afterlife, here to escort you to your new life."

She then flipped to the next page of the script.

"The first choice is to go straight to heaven and enjoy eternal peace."

"Honestly anything but sitting with this room would be immensely enjoyable at this moment."

"However, you lose your physical body, and you would just relax and chat in the sunlight 24/7 once there."

"Huh?!"

"No joys such as eating, sleeping, watching anime, or even reading light novels would be present for you once in heaven. Not to mention all lewd material and acts are prohibited in heaven as those are deemed possibly sinful."

"Wait, I thought heaven was supposed to be my personalized paradise…"

"Sucks right? You would just be a floating entity with only your mind intact. Basically the summary of everything you treasured in your previous life is entirely gone once in heaven."

"Yeah… going straight to heaven and basking in the sunlight doesn't sound so appealing anymore..." I stated disappointed.

"The second is reincarnating and beginning a new life."

"Hold on... you can reincarnate me into a new life? THAT sounds amazing! Can you reincarnate me into a 16 year old japanese boy again?"

"Only this time give me a cute imouto step-sister who adores me! Oh, and also add another non-blood related sister who constantly wavers between hate and love for me like a tsundere! That would my dream come true."

I never got to experience a funny sibling relationship due to being an only child. To be able to live my harem/ecchi protagonists' worlds with a simple flick of the wrist did seem like a fantasy come true.

"No longer hiding your lewdness eh?" She scoffed. "Not unexpected of a guy like you. However... sadly for you, I can only resurrect you as a baby in the world."

"Really only a baby? Well then do I also keep…"

"That also means that when you come back, you won't remember your past life at all."

All of my vast knowledge of " _art and literature_ " would be gone?

That wouldn't be worth the trouble of enduring primary school all over again.

"I guess that takes reincarnation out of the picture for me then." I replied again disappointed. "Any other options?"

The "divine" goddess Aqua then proceeded to put down her script and leaned in with her hand beside her mouth, covering it as if she was whispering a secret.

"Usually those are the only two options I can offer to people that join the afterlife. However, I can offer you a deal that your little otaku heart just can't refuse."

"I'm all ears. Go on, the supposed Goddess Aqua." I retorted with a smirk.

She briefly glanced at me with disdain then proceeded with her deal.

"How would you like to immerse yourself in light-novels? The very ones you happen to love so much and spend countless hours on. For real this time?" She asked enticingly.

And with that, the rude goddess actually seemed to be useful for once.


	3. Chapter 1 Part 3

**Part 3:**

The supposed goddess Aqua began to elaborate her little deal in the most over-dramatic manner possible.

"Imagine a parallel world abounding with monsters, magic, and adventures! There are beautiful damsels in distress to save and..."

"Let me stop you right there goddess. Just off of the words "parallel world" I can see what is deal really is about."

Reading series like Respawn:Zero and Sexy Archmages Online have taught me all I need to know about these _parallel worlds_.

"I am assuming that this world is in some kind of mortal peril. Perhaps some kind of evil is threatening the world's safety. There's also probably a secret organization or I don't know a demon king at the head of this threat."

"And to combat this looming problem, you're planning to send me as your chosen hero to this world. I then go on to vanquish the evil from this "parallel" world and provide peace to the land."

"Let's me guess. I'm dead on-point. As expected of someone as knowledgeable as myself." I stated matter of factly as I basked in my pride.

"More like as expected of an otaku that only spends time reading run-of-the-mill fantasy genre books. It's rude to interrupt people you know. Can you socialize and read a situation like a normal person?" Aqua rebutted.

"Well… at least your attachment to those novels shortened the time explaining this to you. The less time I spend with a Train Stain like you, the better." She noted crudely.

"See! Reading light novels is wholesome and beneficial after all you punk goddess." I commented.

Aqua the goddess brushed off my off-handed comment and continued her explanation.

"Many of the people who die in this parallel world do not wish to be reincarnated back into the world. Probably due to constant threat of monsters or the demon king's army pillaging through the land. Wouldn't blame them to be honest… people die a lot in this world."

"A majority of those who are killed this way instantly chose to decline going back to this world. Even those who died peacefully, they rather wish to ascend into heaven or reincarnate somewhere else to avoid dying by such horrifying threats."

"This created a gradual decrease in the amount of people returning this world to combat the Demon King's forces."

"So we, the goddesses of this world, take it upon ourselves to recruit young souls that have passed away in other worlds and offer them the opportunity to start anew."

"These young individuals, who died young and who happily accept this offer, are permitted all of their previous memories as well as their original bodies. In addition, we adjust their minds so that they can read and comprehend the language of this world. Also..."

Though this offer sounded more enticing by the second, she did just say people died a lot. I already died one gruesome death. Let's not tempt fate while I still can avoid it.

"A world where its inhabitants could be killed by a ruthless demon army at any time?"

"A world that has even the people who died naturally not wanting to reincarnate back into?"

"What makes you think that I would go to such a dangerous parallel world again?" I questioned disdainfully as a student would to their least favorite professor.

Aqua sigh with an annoyed expression as she explained the reasons why.

"Okay first off, because it's either that, losing your memories, or being an eternal virgin."

"Secondly, you probably still want to go to a fantasy world to live out your dumb dreams."

"Thirdly, typically heroes who defeat the demon king or complete heroic acts get to marry a beautiful princess and live a luxurious life."

"Are those enough reasons for your _royal neet-ness_ or would you like me to go on?" She explained with irritated tone akin to someone who's instructing a stubborn child.

Damn can't argue with that. She basically summarized the main reasons to go to a parallel world like the one she described.

In addition, it was a tad bit rude to interrupt a girl, even a girl as troublesome as her. It would probably be best to not piss off the goddess in charge of handing me my new life.

"Alright, I'm sorry Aqua. I perhaps went a bit too far there. You are the divine goddess who's reviving me after all." I apologized begrudgingly, almost dying on the inside.

The Goddess Aqua suddenly changed her aloof expression, amazed and slightly questionable of what I just said.

After a moment, Aqua gave me a genuine smile as she fully processed my apology and my recognition of her divine status.

She then began to twirl happily with her long blue silky hair after settling down back in her chair. "Now that you finally stopped interrupting and realized me for the goddess that I am, I can finish explaining." Aqua noted with a much more cheerful tone.

"To make sure the young souls we send into this world won't just die or end up completely useless, we grant them special abilities or powerful sacred relics to assist them along with their journey to defeat the Demon King."

Aqua waved her hand and a dazzling array of cards with detailed pictures on them appeared on the floor before me.

"The gift I can bestow upon you can be anything from a special ability to high-level enchanted armor. However, choose carefully as you can only choose one divine attribute to bring with you."

Only one object? But there's so much to choose from.

I always wanted to wield a demonic cursed sword or wear heavenly enchanted armor that repelled all debuffs. Items that really were straight out of the light novels I read. However, those items, in of themselves, seemed so limited in their capabilities and so mind-boggling mundane for someone as intelligent, cunning, and capable as myself.

Decisions. Decisions. Decisions.

"I do not have any idea for what to bring to this parallel world to be honest with you Aqua. Any suggestions?"

"I would suggest that you hurry up Train Stain. It's not going to make a difference when you of people get there. Heroes have been fighting the Demon King for a very long time. "

Just when I thought this petty little brat of a goddess was actually appealing for an instance… Wait. She just said heroes have been fighting the Demon King for a very long time. It would probably be best to pick an item which could be useful for a long time.

"Hold on what's that item beside you on the drawer?" I asked.

The water goddess looked down at what seemed to be a cube with a handle on top and an illuminating circle on each of the other sides.

"Oh this little thing. This is my divine portal cube or otherwise known as a Sozo box. It makes small items that I want whenever I get bored in this little office of mine."

"In that case, I'll choose the Sozo Box then."

"Really, are you sure want to bring that amongst all the divine relics in front of you? I can't and don't want to revive you a second time if you do something dumb again."

"I didn't do anything dumb, alright! I did what any self-righteous individual like myself would do! I helped a girl with her books… it's not like the girl's attractive body and face were the reasons I decided to help, stupid." I hastily replied, slightly in part to uphold my dignity.

The goddess simply placed the side of her face in her hand, sending the message "Uh-Huh. Go on, I'm _absolutely_ interested," with her smug body-language.

I continued. "Besides, why would someone as destined for greatness as myself need such beginner-friendly items such as those divine relics. It would render my journey incredibly boring to experience and retell to all my future adoring fans."

"I'm going to be in this world for a very long time. So, I might as well catch up on all my anime, manga, and light novels in the meantime right? You see... I'm clearly more thoughtful than your average hero." I exclaimed as I displayed the full extent of my brilliance with a smug face.

"Wow, you really did show me… that you are actually even dumber than I could ever imagine! You just chose a little box to take with you to fight the Demon King's army!"

"You're the first person and the probably only person I will ever meet to be "genius" enough to not choose a divine relic!" She was laughing at the top of her lungs and rolling on the floor.

My face began to twitch uncontrollably as she continued her obnoxious laughter.

She finally recomposed herself after enjoying herself thoroughly via laughing at me.

"Wow. I haven't laughed like that in years, Train Stain."

"Don't call me that! It's not like I need to be reminded of how my first kiss from a girl went." I pouted angrily.

Aqua replied, "Train Stain, Koman, you can hardly tell the difference. Anyways, my job in guiding you is now complete. Your "extraordinary" life is no longer my problem anymore." Aqua declared with a elated voice and hands thrown in the air.

"Complete? What do you mean?

A blue circle of mystic energy began to form around where I was sitting.

"Farewell Takeda Koman-san! You will be journeying to the parallel world of your light novels now!" Aqua shouted as she waved her hand goodbye towards me.

I was slowly being lifted into the air.

"You will receive one wish from the heavens if you can defeat the demon king."

"The wish can fulfill anything you desire, a gift only given to the most worthy of heroes. In the end, it probably doesn't matter. Someone like you can't even hope to defeat the Demon King." Aqua remarked with brutal honesty .

I noticed that I was slowly being pulled towards a white portal above me as she ran her mouth off. In complete frustration and disdain of this goddess, I uttered at the top of lungs.

"Just you wait you self-entitled trash goddess! "You'll see one day the unrecognized prodigy that I am! I'll venture on amazing adventures! I'll get my own harem of magically gifted girls wooed by my effortless charm! Most of all, I'll defeat the Demon King without your stupid divine relics!"

The goddess Aqua began to laugh even harder than she did a few minutes before and fell on her back from the intense laughter.

"And when I do defeat the Demon King, my wish will be that you will go on the very same perilous journey that you sent your _champion_ on!" I threatenly announced.

"I cannot wait for the day you finally realize my brilliance and beg before me as you are slowly lifted away, knowing that you snubbed the greatest adventurer of all time!"

I will not let this petty little princess win! It goes against all my "questionably" reasonable morals.

Right before I passed through the white portal, Aqua stood up and concluded with a half-suppressed laughter, " Farewell my _champion_ Koman! I place my divine blessing upon you. May you be victorious and triumph in all of your trials and adventures! You will certainly become the one to defeat the demon king…"

"Without further ado, I bid you goodbye!"

"I'll defeat the Demon King, even if the whole world doubts me! Don't you forget it!" I shouted as I passed through the portal. And like that, I was on my way to god knows where.

As Aqua bid farewell to her destined _champion_ , she sat back in her goddess throne and began to open a bag of potato chips.

Aqua then recounted on the soul she just sent off.

"What a strange high-school teenage boy. He looks like he could be nice and charming, but really is just full of himself."

"Perhaps I'll descend onto the world a couple of months from now just to tease him. That'll give him the _recognition_ he deserves!" Aqua deviously thought.

Aqua then stared towards the spot where the portal once was.

"He actually believes he will ever defeat the Demon king with that delusional brain of his… even if the whole world doubts him." she said in pure disbelief.

"Maybe he really is more than I give him credit for…"

"Whatever, I'm just glad that I will never have to encounter another teenage boy as troublesome as he was."

She bit down on her potato chips as the next soul was teleported into the room.


	4. Chapter 1 Part 4

**Part 4:**

A dazzling array of vibrant colors, sensations, and spectacles raced passed my eyes as I was transported from that little room. Floating objects of mesmerizingly beautiful geometry caught my attention as they whizzed by. Their asymmetry was aligned in ways beyond human description, invoking a sense of awe.

The lights, the shadows, and even the atmosphere itself of the portal seemed to entwine and wrap around my figure within its mysterious, but captivating wonder. Emotions of splendor, horror, and mysticism engulfed me as I fell through a void that was innately more profound that the reality I lived in ever was.

Well, that least those were thoughts I would have pondered upon more indepthly. However, that wasn't the case because I was, after, all falling at an immense speed…

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I exclaimed in utter fear of my eventual second death at the hands of that inconsiderate goddess. Even if I do make it to this _parallel world_ , the chances are I won't make it alive at this velocity.

My face welled up with tears as the air continued to rush more and more rapidly past me. This is it. I'm going to die again just because I ran my mouth off.

I began to recount on all the memories that made my life, my amazingly thrilling and inspiring life, mine.

My 5th birthday… I remember the sheer joy I had when I got my first bike. Wait hold on. Didn't Kenshi and the guys give me a bike that had loose screws in it on that day. That probably would explain me almost dying when the bike came apart as I went down hill at the park a week later…

Okay. How about my first day at High School? I pondered deeply. Yeah that's the day I chatted with a girl in my class and she smiled back at me.

Well, at least until my cousin Daisuke pantsed me in front of everyone. She didn't even make eye contact with me ever after he showcased my collector's edition of Satou's Neko Posse underwear for all to see.

C'mon, there's got to be something purely enjoyable to recall upon. Enjoyable? I recalled the scene with the blonde girl. Feeling her soft, gentle hands underneath mine. Her radiant yellow eyes piercing and enriching my soul and heart. The warmth of her laughter as we acted out a fairy tale charade.

Yeah, I guess that was great wasn't it. Even if it was for about 10 minutes. Then the memories of her sinister laughing reemerged in my mind. The emotional pain and definitely the physical pain of her deliberate destruction of my hopes resurfaced. Above it all, the memory of THAT FREAKING TRAIN that send me here in the first place.

Yeah nevermind. There wasn't even a single moment I could recall upon right now being great in my life. Fantastic. What a disappointing thought to end on, literally.

As I wallowed in melancholy of my "wonderfully blessed life", the swirling and illuminating void began to converge in a circle of white light.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I exclaimed as the void began to narrow more and more as I came closer to the white light.

Unexpectedly, I stopped almost instantly before the white portal, as if gravity was momentarily ignored and i began to hover slightly above the portal.

Thank god. My sobbing and terrified face couldn't take this torture any longer. Perhaps the goddess had a change of heart once she saw my conviction and my humbled state.

"I promise that I'll kind of never be prideful again!" I exclaimed sobbingly towards where I fell from. "I'll pray every day, thanking you for your somewhat great generosity if you just give my old life back."

"Oh and since you are a divine and generous goddess, maybe hand me an imouto sister while you're at it." I added.

It never hurts to aspire for great things in life and nothing is greater than the unwavering and true admiration of people, especially of your little imouto sister.

The white portal began to fluctuate into what appeared to be the image of a cloudy yet bright world teeming with a feeling of childlike imagination and wonder.

Then the force that was holding me afloat dissipated and I fell right through the portal before me.

Really. I just had to ask for an imouto sister. Whelp, there goes my only chance at living my old life again.

I resumed my thoroughly horrified and extensive screaming as I fell through the new portal.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

The portal opened up and I was dropped about 3m in the air and into a public spring.

"Ow… I will feel that in the morning." I remarked as I slowly crawled out of the water.

As I slowly stood up from the pool I just crashed upon, I took a glimpse at my surroundings and this new _parallel world._ It was just almost nighttime with cloudy skies still lit with a fading light and a cold breeze flowing throughout the air. The street was illuminated thoroughly as there were luminous lamp posts every so few meters.

The ground was paved with smooth, refined cobblestone, and the houses were made of stylistic masonry and brick. The atmosphere of this town was not too far out of place of a 19th century European city in my World History textbooks.

I found myself shivering in the darkness as a chilly gust blew past me. I better get to somewhere warm. This wet school uniform isn't going to cut it in keeping me alive even if this is a fantasy world.

The fragrance of springtime gently blew past me as I walked down this unfamiliar place, not knowing really when and where I was. This feeling of uncertainty yet enticing curiosity of exploring this world welled up inside me.

I turned up on what seemed to be a center plaza. In the middle of the the plaza was a statue. The statue was a beautifully robed sorcereress that had her long hair put together into an elegant bun. She struck a heroic pose as she wielded with two hands a scepter in the air. The scepter was a long staff marked with golden strokes running down it and had an olive wreath surrounding a jewel on the end. This jewel glistened with a radiant yellow and red splendor as it was magically illuminated light that lit up the whole surrounding area. On a plaque at the base read an inscription.

"It is not strength or agility, but mental cunning itself that is most sacredly treasured.

As the ability to outsmart the foe and to see past the veil is what needs to be measured.

Through the trials, the once valuable assets of the physical body crumble and degrade.

What is left untouched, the distinct ingenuity of the mind will be one's greatest aid.

The light, the spark, the passion that drives us forward past the solemn night is the mind's holy aura.

Forever hail and exalt the most reverent and compassionate goddess, our blessed matron Theodora!"

This inscription almost had an enchanting, mesmerizing effect to it. This goddess appeared to speak to me. A goddess that revered mental acuity and smart individuals like myself. It would probably be a delight to meet such a beautiful and insightful goddess. Much more fun, at least, than my time with that " _divine"_ water goddess...

I then looked up from to inscription. Behind the statue was a main avenue and what appeared to be a large, multi-storied building in a center of a square. Its windows on the main floor radiated warmth and welcoming feelings as one gets when returning home.

I opened the door and walked inside this glowing, welcoming building. The inside of the building appeared to resemble that a elegant hall of a homely hotel. There were two main passageways in the mall hall, one pointing to the tavern on the left and the other to the adventurer's guild room on right.

Further back, there was a wide staircase in the center that diverged into two, one going left of the building and another right. Below the left part of the center staircase was a sign-in booth and an newsboard on the right.

At the sign-in booth, there were two nicely dressed female receptionists, delightfully chatting with one another. I walked up them and politely asked, "Hello, my name is Koman. Would you mind to tell me where I am now? I'm a bit new to this town."

The female receptionists turned around and were startled at the sight of my completely soaked self. "Eeep! What happened to you?" The slightly taller, short haired receptionist shockingly inquired.

"Oh just little accident with a person while passing by at the springs." I replied on the spot.

It would probably be best to not inform them of my unusual arrival in this world.

"Well, to answer your question, you're at the Adventurer's' Guild Lodge. It's where most of the beginner and immediate adventurers of this city live whilst doing quests. The shorter, long-haired receptionist stated.

Interesting… so it's like a dormitory for starter adventurers like me. Kind of perfect really.

"Typically most people stay here until they have enough money to move out." The shorter, long-haired receptionist added. "Though some like the comfortable lodging we provide and just stay as permanent tenants."

"No matter which one you choose Mr. Koman, it would be best right now to get you some dry clothes so you don't get sick." The taller receptionist mentioned. "Here let me get you a receptionist uniform that you could borrow in the meantime."

She quickly looked underneath the booth's counter and pulled out a male receptionist uniform. The top was velvet red with golden shoulder stripes and golden buttons running down the uniform and the wrists. The pants were a matching uniform velvet red.

"Perfect, I was starting to freeze in these clothes." I stated. I couldn't just wait to get in fresh clothing. I then proceeded to take off my shirt and unzip my pants, forgetting that I was in fact in front of two girl strangers.

" **WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING!"** The taller receptionist shielded her face and embarrassingly exclaimed. "You don't have change right in front of us you pervert!"

"I'm I'm sorry about that! My mind just went blank for a moment." I hastily replied.

Oh boy. First impressions and I'm already a male pervert…

"I don't know about that. He does seem kind of hot… I mean yeah we would prefer that you change in the restroom!" The shorter receptionist noted blushing as she looked at my naked upper half and open fly.

Both the taller receptionist and I looked at the shorter receptionist in awe and slight confusion. I then quickly zipped up my fly noticing the flaring red faces looking back at me.

Her co-worker's sparkling and almost lewd eyes continued to gaze upon me without blinking...

The taller receptionist sighed and awkwardly said," Okay, typically we charge a moderate amount to lodge new adventurers for the week. But looking at you, you're probably going to need the week and the clothes at a much lower price. So I'll only charge you 10,000 Eris."

10,000 Eris? Sounds like the currency of this world. Too bad I only have my soaked clothes and Sozo Box. Wait, the Sozo Box! It can create things that I wish for right?

I pulled out the Sozo Box and pondered deeply on something of value that could pay for my lodging. The box glowed and a swirl of light descended upon my hand. Two pairs of elegantly beautiful pearl earrings manifested themselves in my other free hand.

"I'm not sure how much 10,000 Eris is worth… but I hope this can cover it." I remarked sleepily. Hmm. The Sozo Box must take up some energy to use because I was drastically more tired and mentally dull than I was a few moment ago.

The two girls' eyes lit up in awe of these beautiful earrings. The shorter girl eagerly reached for the earrings but was stopped by the taller girl.

"Are you sure about that? These earrings could easily be worth 350,000 Eris in total. It would be wrong to just scam you."

"Honestly, I just want to get some much-needed sleep in a nice warm bed." I sleepily answered. The girl then took a pair of earrings as their own, with joy clearly on their faces.

"Okay then. Suzy, would you mind holding down the fort while I escort our guest to his room?"

"You can count on me Helina!" The shorter girl exclaimed, ecstatic about the new pearl earrings she was wearing.

The taller girl smiled in reply and gestured my almost asleep self to follow her. We walked up the left of staircase, down a hallway, and approached a door at the end of the hall.

She stated," Here's your room, Room 928. And here's your room key. As a guest, you have access to the tavern for your meals. You also have access to the adventurer guild room, where you can get yourself equipped, partied up with others, and ready for quests."

The room was about 4m by 4m, complete with a bed near the wall and a bathroom. It had a nice homely feel to it and the view was quite nice as it overlooked the brightly lit streets.

"Thanks for everything… I'm really tired. Good night mommy." I stupidly and tiredly announced as I flopped on the bed.

The receptionist sighed as she left a bag of coins on the top of the bed.

"A little something for your generous gift. It'll help get you through the week while you search for quests to do. The life of adventurer isn't as easy as most people think it is.

She then noticed that I was mostly asleep, snoring a bit as well.

"You're really something different, Mr. Koman. Good luck on your time here." She whispered as she quietly closed the door.


	5. Chapter 1 Part 5

**Part 5:**

The next morning, I woke up and found a bag of coins on the bed beside me. I examined the coins. They seemed to have an inscription on them saying "Blessing upon You!" and the image of a fair goddess. _Fair… goddess._ _Why do those words conflict? I wonder…_

Either way, it was nice of the ladies to get me this room, the uniform, and that bag of coin. See you condescending goddess. People do recognize my admirable self after all.

I then changed into the uniform. Noticing wrapped around my neck, was a silver heart necklace. A necklace that so happened to look like one I own… Wait. I looked at the inscription. It had my name on it… No it can't be. I took off the necklace hastily and put it away. An image of the sickly girl flashed in my mind again. I then paced quickly out of the bathroom. Just forget about it already. It brings nothing but pain to remember...

Clearly distressed and of need of distractions, I walked downstairs and into the tavern to grab a bite to eat. The tavern was a large and thoroughly packed pub that had many tables and occupied benches laid throughout the room.

To left was the windows and the right the bar against the wall, a bar that served a staggering variety of drinks. Besides the bar was a door into the kitchen. Lastly, there was a large stage for what I assumed dancing and entertainment.

I took a sit at one of the tables beside a yellow and red eyed hooded figure and a waitress then took my order. Apparently they served fried frog legs with milk as breakfast here. It tasted actually tasted really delicious, having delicate and flavourful taste for such a slimy amphibian. _It tasted like chicken._

After clearing my plate and paying for the meal (Took me a while since she had to help me learn the different currency coin values. Apparently, Eris seem to be similar to Yen in value. Go figure), I made my way towards the adventurers' guild room.

The room was an armory of magical items and weapons, such as swords, potions, and, mostly importantly, stylish clothing for those with refined taste like myself. My eyes were fascinated by the sheer variety and quality of said items.

Occupying this room was an assortment of characters. There were dazzlingly armored crusaders, hardened swordmasters, cute capped mages with their staffs in hand, and elegantly dressed priestesses.

As I walked passed them and up to the counter, I met the the shorter, long-haired receptionist from before.

"Thanks for the earrings Mr. Koman! They really do complement my outfit! How can I help you?" She gleefully asked.

I smiled in pride of knowing that my gift made her genuinely happy and replied, "I was wondering if I could apply to be an adventurer." After all, this is a fantasy world like in my light novels. So why not become an adventurer.

"Of course! Let me get you situated." She brought over a device propped up on three legs, with an orb hovering in the center, with smaller orbs encircling it in the air.

"Place your hand on the device please." She instructed.

As I placed my hand upon the device, I felt a tingling sensation throughout my body.

She then recited a small incantation and a transparent magical panel was brought out before her.

"Let's see. You're 167 cm tall, weigh 59 Kg, have light black spikey hair, and have dark brown eyes with glasses" She stated. "You also have slightly above average magical damage and middling stamina. However, your agility is absurdly high for a new adventurer!"

As it should be… for a track star such as myself. I smirked pridefully.

"On the other hand, your strength, intelligence, and damage resistance is a bit on the more pathetic side. Your luck stat is also by far the lowest value imaginable…"

"With all of your stats taken in account for, you are well over-qualified for the role of adventurer. Let's see… you don't have just quite enough mana reserves for mage or archpriest. Your damage resistance and strength will hinder you if you choose swordmaster or crusader. Not many of these options would work for you..."

My face froze in sadness. Wasn't she just exclaiming about how great I was…

"I got it! You would be perfect as a rogue! They're mid-tier offensive powerhouses!"

A rogue huh? The stylish, mysterious assassin that lurks in the shadows and strikes with cunning and precision. Who wears the most badass clothing and says the most intimidating of lines. Most importantly, the one ladies find interesting as a rogue's mysterious nature entices them to know more. Yeah I could definitely go for that.

"Yeah. I'll become a rogue. That's sounds great!" I remarked whilst dreaming of the rogue I was to become.

"It's settled then! The rogue class will grant you bonus attack and agility, but massively decrease your damage resistance. Should be fine though." She noted excitedly. With a flashing light, she crafted a card and then handed it to me.

The card read my name, my physical and magical stats, and my class as Rogue in bold.

"Your card will read your experience points and level. As you level up, you accumulate enough experience points to spend on special skills and abilities."

"The card also reads how strong you are and how many foes you defeat. The more enemies you defeat, the more you will level up and the stronger you will get. Overall as a level one rogue, you're off to a great start."

"You can take up quests as a rogue to earn a living and join up with guilds to assist you. There's a postboard in the lobby mentioning available quests and hiring guilds. Here's a gift on my part for the earrings." She handed me a small dagger and its sheath.

"Thank you so much" I stated smiling,

"You're most definitely welcome! Good luck!"

Now that I got my class, I just need to join a guild and go on adventures. At this rate, I can already taste that goddess's tears.

I looked upon the newsboard and found a list of available guilds that were hiring.

"Whelp, these guilds aren't going to witness my greatness if I'm just holed up in this lobby."

I then confidently marched off to the headquarters of each of the several guilds.

The responses were… interesting.

The first guild politely replied, "Sorry, we are not accepting applicants at the moment."

The fifth reasoned, "Too low-leveled. Our guild only accepts lvl 10 and above. Come back when you have level up a bit."

The twentieth was just rudely asked, "What are you even wearing? A receptionist's uniform?"

Not to worry, it's only the first day. I'll apply again tomorrow.

The next day, the guilds responded slightly differently…

Guild #1: "We won't be accepting applicants for the week. Please don't come again tomorrow."

Guild #5: "Our level requirement now is at least level 15 so you best go away and level up a bit."

Guild #20: "Are you still wearing that receptionist's uniform?"

Another day gone by without success. Well third time's the charm right?

The third day was certainly the charm! This time they all said….

 **Guild #1: "No." [Slams the Door]**

 **Guild #5: "No." [Slams the Door]**

 **Guild #20: "No." [Slams the Door]**

I was writing another application form for a guild when I decided to just rip it up into pieces. "Damn it all! I'm tired of signing up for stupid guilds that just say no whenever I show up! What's the point!"

Apparently, applying for guild admissions is like job applications. Nerve-wracking, time-consuming, and most of all, depressing.

I stomped on the paper in anger and then slowly stopped in sadness. This was supposed to be a new start into a wonderful life. All I got so far was sending applications and doing job interviews in vain. My old school life was never this hard... I really do miss my old life sometimes. I sighed deeply whilst surrounded by these thoughts.

It was already almost sunset of the third day. Another whole day was wasted for nothing.

Just I was about to head back to the guild disappointed, a stranger walked past me, slightly gracing my shoulder. Its shoulder momentarily brushed against my own.

"Sorry about that. Wait, can you help me out? I'm new to this town and I have been having a hard time joining a guild. Happen to know any beginner guilds around here?"

The figure briefly turned around, marking a familiar trance of yellow and red light motion in my eyes then began to pace slightly faster.

"Wait, do I know you? Hold on! I need to ask you a couple of questions!" I inquired as I began pace after this mysterious stranger who seemed intent to avoid me.

I darted after the hooded stranger as it dashed down the brightly-lit streets of this industrious town. The shadowy persona took many left and right turns, passed through wide lanes and narrowing alleyways, and ventured through uphill and downhill streets.

As it made one more left turn onto another street, I rushed with a burst of speed to finally catch up with this slippery figure.

However, as I rounded the corner, the stranger was on the other side of the street. The person doned a mildly tattered black and red cloak, with the hood raised up and covering the ambiguous face of theirs. A slight but intensely bright glint of light shined forth from the figure's eyes, and a slight smirk was revealed as the slim figure slipped into the shadows.

It was as if the stranger had just phased through reality, effortlessly evading my pursuits and waiting slightly long enough to continue a one-side game of cat and mouse.

The sound of fleeing footsteps then began to fade as the stranger vanished, their light echos were definitely too far to ever hope to catch up.

As I made my way towards where I last saw the figure, I looked down upon the ground to notice a red and yellow trace of faint light. I began to follow that stream of red and yellow light down an alley.

The faint trail of luminous crimson and gold light started to increase in brightness the longer I followed it down the winding corridors and pathways of this interesting complex city.

The swirl of concentrated red and yellow light displayed itself at a dead end of an alley. As I walked towards this pulsing flash, the swirl phased into the wall and into one certain brick. With slight hesitation, I approached the brick and pressed slowly onto the brick into the wall.

The luminous light shining forth from the brick began to spread across the brick wall until the lights formed the image of a door upon the wall. Then a door began to manifest itself from top to bottom, turning from brick to stylish wood in a matter of seconds.

This newly formed door's doorknob then began to turn and the door swung open with an eerie atmosphere as if it opened on its own.

Slowly and curiously, I peeked my head into the dimly lit opening in the wall and proceeded to venture down into this mysterious passageway.

With cautious and careful steps, I descended down the stairs of this hidden route and began to hear conversations and laughter as I ventured forward.

There lay a large room that was dimly lit crimson red from magical lights hovering along the ceiling. It was filled with round tables that were occupied by hooded figures in black and red. A few of them seemed to be playing a familiar magical card game, with some laughing thoroughly and others expressing immense anger.

The majority of them seemed to be deep discussion, displaying magic with flicks of their wrists to emphasize a point they were making. In the very back was a circle of what seemed to be the leaders of the gathering. This group of leaders was comprised of three main hooded individuals delightfully chatting. There was a male hooded figure on the right and on the left. In the middle, there was a ravishingly beautiful young woman.

This stunningly beautiful woman suddenly noticed me and called out, "Excuse me? Are you the new " _exceptional_ " recruit that was just transferred to our sector?"

Everyone in the room turned their head towards me and the room turned silent.

It could end really badly if I pretended to be someone else, but after all those interviews, I just couldn't stand being rejected once more.

I was completely nervous but declared anyways, "Oh, of course I'm the recruit! Who else looks as talented as myself! Though I didn't get the memo that it was black and red cloaks instead of bellhop uniforms…"

The whole room was still silent. Oh great… here comes yet _another_ rejection from yet _another_ guild.

The whole room then suddenly lit up with ecstatic laughter. I chuckled hesitantly along. Not sure if they were laughing with me or at me, but hey I'll take what I can get.

The two male leaders glanced at each other with eyebrows raised in disbelief, but were soon discreetly reassured by the woman in the middle.

The woman delightfully giggled and said, "Oh fantastic! I didn't know Minerva was sending her " _chosen_ " recruit so soon! I'm Minerva's main lieutenant, Circe." With a flick of the wrist she formed a translucent crimson rose in her hand blew it like a kiss towards me. It landed on my cheek and dissipated into several rose petals that shortly disappeared. "Welcome to the Order of the Crimson Rose."

Everyone then cheered loudly for the new recruit amongst them. They began to wrapped around me and congulate me as the new addition to the guild.

I began to heavily bawl and shoot out tears of happiness that streamed down my elated face. I looked up towards ceiling and threw up my arms in sheer, absolute joy.

" **YES! FINALLY, I DID IT!"** I declared to the world as one would after landing an amazing job, as one who once endured dozens interviews and rejections.

This seemed like too much of a coincidence. Just happening to be in the right place at the right time to pretend to be this recruit. It really did seem like a light novel, with its deus ex machinas and all. Almost like a divine intervention. But, really at this point, I couldn't care less. **I did it!**

Finally, as expected, I joined a guild! One more step towards defeating the Demon King and relishing the sweet cries of that goddess as I see her being sent off. **My wonderful journey had finally officially began!**


	6. Chapter 2 Part 1

**Chapter 2: An Interesting Beginning for This "Talented" Rogue** **Part 1:**

A fading light filtered into my tired eyes. "Ow…" I said sluggishly as I slowly opened my eyes.

I found myself curled up against the wall in a dark barred cell illuminated by setting sun which shone directly on my face.

What happened exactly? How did I even end up here? The memories began to slowly reemerge as my still foggy mind struggled to comprehend the events of last night.

I slowly sat up and brushed the confetti out of my hair. I then winced as a minor headache overtook me for a slight moment. A blaze of lights, commotion, and idiotic behavior flashed in my mind. Must of have been one hell of a party.

I have never really gone to parties lately actually… or at least my classmates never really seemed to invite me to many social events back home. Probably due to my intimidatingly talented persona and status I reassured myself.

After this little thought, I cleaned off the dust on my bellhop uniform and my pants to feel an object in my pocket. I pulled the object out to see a translucent guild card in my hand.

For a moment, the card read The Order of the Crimson Rose with my name underneath it.

The next moment, an image of a female cloaked figure appeared. She laxly posed with a staff, only her glistening reddish yellow eyes and bright smile were visible under the mysterious hood.

The words "Dare to let your destiny shine with a crimson glow?" illuminated below her. The card then continuingly swapped between these two images.

I pondered slightly on this as I sat there in this cold, unfamiliar prison. A familiar woman in black and red was at my cell.

"Wakey wakey sleepy head! Do you enjoy your little welcoming to our Guild? I do know you certainly enjoyed being the "exceptionally" gifted idiot from what I saw last night!

"You, the ravishly thick woman from last night! What the hell happened to me?! And my name is Koman for your information!" I retorted with a slur as I was still a bit hazy.

"Koman. Idiot. Synonymous from what I've seen. Also, let's touch on that. First off, I have never seen a new recruit so drunk to the point that he, while being shirtless, got up in front of his female superior and tried to hit on her!"

Really, I stripped again… this time in front of my new superior… this woman to whom I proceeded to hit on whilst being drunk… F**k my " _goddess blessed_ " life.

"I'm still surprised by your boldness towards me and the plethora of other idiotically entertaining stuff you did last night."

"Wait what! There's more!?" I replied astonished.

"Oh of course! It wouldn't be a party if you just did one stupid thing right?" She exclaimed maniacally.

"After chugging kegs worth of beer with the guys and hitting on the "ravishingly thick" moi, you went out on the town square with the guys. One of the more wasted guys suggested the brilliant idea of Rock Paper Strippers."

"Rock Paper Strippers? Oh god. Please don't tell me what I think you're going to say. I'm BEGGING YOU TO STOP!" I cried out on the verge of tears.

"I'm BEGGING YOU TO GO ON? Ok then. And like the maniac you were, you played so hard your remaining clothes fell off. Everyone was laughing their asses off at the drunk boy recruit who was nude before the whole town square. And let's just say your weapon of choice isn't going to be a longsword anytime soon..."

"LALALALA! I'm not listening!" I shouted as I rolled around in circles with my hands covering my ears.

"But you're going to miss the best part, my little novice."

I turned in absolute horror to see the gleaming crimson eyes of this terror of a woman, who's about to impart upon me words of abject misery.

"Upon being fully nude and completely drunk, you decided expertly to run off from the group and into a nearby festival. Every man, woman, and child was scarred by the sight of your drunk nude body tearing through the screen of the shadow play. Best of all, you even set off the firework show prematurely, resulting in pandemonium in the streets. It took 5 police knights to subdue you as you kept resisting and mumbling out "I'll make that goddess pay!" You just might be the greatest town fool this city has ever seen!"

I instinctively began to rock myself in the fetal position and suck my thumb, absolutely devastated by the news of the complete destruction of my social status.

"With that aside, the Order of the Crimson Rose is the highest level guild of the nation. How did you of all people get to join such an elite and inclusive group like the Order of the Crimson Rose?" my tormentor inquired.

"Well, your superior probably just recognized my unmatched innate genius and decided to recruit me." I protested resignedly as I stopped rocking..

"After the stunt you pulled off, you being a genius is stretching the truth by a lot." Circe stated. "But you did were recruited regardless Koman, so I'll respect that."

I looked up to see a slightly more sympathetic face staring at me.

"Jokes aside, welcome to the Order. We will be beginning your official initiation tonight. You might just prove to be as talented as you profess. But first is the matter of paying bail of 300,000 Eris for charges of reckless shenanigans and public nudity."

I digged into my pockets to pull out a mere 1,000 Eris. I thought to use my divine relic to create an object to pay bail. But in the state I was in, I was in no shape to use a device that drained energy immensely.

"You see, I left my wallet in my other bellhop uniform. Mind if you pay bail just this one time... for guild members' sake?" I shyly proposed.

"Alright then, I'll pay bail if and only if you admit that you're the biggest fool that ever lived, prostrate yourself and kiss my feet, and finally promise dote on me, your beloved and revered onee-chan. I always did want a little doting brother! Hehehe."

"You're an outrageously cruel woman! I may have been publicly shamed, but I still have a shred of dignity left. As the fated hero destined to defeat the Demon King, I will never do something like that in my life!"

She scoffed at my remark. "You do know you're in a jail right?"

"And what about it?"

"That means you'll be eating, sleeping, and most of all showering with other inmates daily. Oh yeah… this is an all male prison by the way."

I let the information sink in for a few moments. Showering… In an all male prison…

I then reverently knelt before her with a dazzling smile said, "As the immense fool I am, I would forever serve you with all my heart beloved onee-chan Circe!"

After giving into all of her ludicrous demands, Circe walked up to the jailor and handed him a small pouch of coins.

"I'll take the drunk neet boy to go please."

"Good. A fellow like that wouldn't last a day in here. Some of the prisoners are extra rowdy here if you know what I mean." The jailor noted winking.

"Can we just go?" I shivered at the experience of being subjugated before Circe and the thought of showering in that prison.

I then followed Circe out of that traumatic jail cell.

"Thanks Circe. It means a lot."

"Huh, losing the badass attitude already? I thought you were the exceptionally talented recruit you told me last night!"

"One crazy night on the town doesn't make me any less talented you cruel dragon-lady!"

"That's not what the _Short-Sword Wonder_ showed last night…" She giggled.

I proceeded to explode with a fiery temper at the sound of yet another nickname.

"JUST YOU WAIT! I'm going to ace this initiation and prove to you just how wrong you are!"

"Go ahead and try. I dare you. Probably can't even accomplish the most basic task like opening a vegetable jar."

First that toilet goddess and now my superior… I prove to them all…

"One day, the whole wide world will see the genius I am. You're always invited to come to my fanclub once I outshine that little guild of yours."

"I'll consider it when adventurers are the best class. Perhaps if you were a bit more thoughtful and true to yourself, people would recognize you for the genius you just so happened to profess yourself to be. Anyways we're here."

Thoughtful and true to myself...

We arrived at the same statue I saw on my first night here. There was a large congregation of Crimson Rose Guild members, about 50 or so, spread around the goddess statue. Circe then went to stand in front of the statue to start the initiation. She signaled the rest of the members to end their side-conversations.

"Alright everyone. Let's get down to business. We have an initiation to conduct for the weekly decoy… I mean new recruit." Most of the members snickered at this slight jeer.

"We are going to be raiding a special location tonight. We'll split up into two groups. I'll be leading Light squadron as the frontal distraction. Our recruit with Wraith Squadron will then infiltrate the enemy stronghold to retrieve the objective. Once he secures the objective, we meet at the rendezvous point and teleport out. Understood?" Everyone silently nodded in agreement.

"But first let's get our guest into the gear worthy of a Crimson Rose." She snapped her fingers as a giant suitcase appeared. It opened to reveal a black hooded cloak with streaks of red and a rose on the back, a dark shirt with red outlining the wrist, collar, and waist, and finally black pants and boots.

She snapped her fingers again and the clothes magically swapped with the uniform I was wearing. I took a look at myself to see myself in classic fantasy world rogue fashion. My eyes were captivated at the sheer sight of my new attire.

Circe approached me and pulled out a small sleek, black rod decorated with rose vines in her hands. "Push the button." It extended into a full-length staff. "Versatile. And concentrate your mana into the rod." At the end of the staff, a curved blade of scarlet energy flowed out to display a scythe in her hands. She then deactivated the scythe and gave the small rod into my hands.

She said. "Ready Koman?" I stood there speechless and baffled at the gifts I just received like an otaku receiving a new volume of his favorite light novel early.

A moment later, she recited an incantation and the whole group began to teleport from the square and to this "special" location.


	7. Chapter 2 Part 2

**Part 2:**

I opened my eyes in awe to see the whole group, in the midst of the night, standing on the outskirts of what seemed to be a heavily guarded fortress in a desolated forest.

The fortress seemed impenetrable as it loomed ominously tall in the background. Under the light of the full moon, I could see the walls being guarded by tiny blurs, perhaps a night-time patrol on watch. My glasses were fogging up a bit, so I couldn't be too sure.

"There lays one of the Demon King's outer strongholds, where the Demon King's commanders rest between campaigns. Alright, Wraith Squadron, remember to only go in on when we start the diversion. Everyone, we're moving out!"

Everyone silently split off into groups, almost already knowing what they needed to do beforehand. I awkwardly followed my group as I had no idea what was about to occur.

Alright, this is it. My time to shine and flaunt my tactical prowess as the destined hero I am. I excitingly sneaked around the outskirts of the east side of the castle. Upon closer inspection, there was a force field surrounding the edges of the castle.

A crackling sound of thunder went off which made me nearly die of shock. It came from Circe's group. She was leading a line of Crimson mages who all simultaneously fired projections of radiant light into the force field. After three barrages, I noticed shield began to crack and dissipate. All of the guards on along the perimeter rushed to combat Circe's squadron, just as planned. Amazed by the spectacle, I watched as her group effortlessly dealt with the onslaught of guards swarming them, unfazed and cool under the overwhelming force.

I then looked around. Oh crap. My group has already moved in. As I eventually caught up with my group, I noticed the foreboding inside of the castle. It was dimly lit with the hazy glow of the full moon through its array of stained glass windows. It gave me shivers up my spine.

"Your job is to retrieve the Demon King's amulet. It's a green gem amulet. We'll keep them occupied in the meantime. Once you retrieve it, meet us at the rendezvous point." Squadron leader Ivan sternly informed me as we reached the main stairway.

Just as he finished, a several necromancers accompanied by their quivering skeletons swarmed around our squadron. The necromancers timidly demanded for us to stop.

"Stop intruders! You must leave the premises or we will probably use force! Though to be honest, we got a gig to get to later tonight. I would prefer if you guys just leave… Pretty please?"

The guild members' eyes and hands around me began to glow confidently with a distinct crimson light. My squad leader joked, "Hurry up recruit or you'll miss up on the fun!"

Wraith Squadron's leader pointed his staff to blast a ray of energy through the horde of cowardly enemies before them.

"Alright, let's see if you truly a Crimson Rose. Now go."

I nodded to Ivan and anxiously sprinted up the flight of stairs as the squadron descended upon the panicking Demon King's forces. When I reached the highest level of the castle, I turned around a corner to see a white translucent woman in a flowing dress chatting with two humanoid dragon guards. They reminded me of the Drakonid race fromthe fantasy light novels I read, scaley dragon-like beings of the typical RPG variety.

"I want this little charade to be crushed! I can't have my beloved master waking up from her beauty sleep. I'll slaughter anyone who fails to put down this pesky assault. GOT IT!?"

The translucent mature woman abruptly turned towards my direction of the hallway.

I instinctively hid around the corner right before the white spector could notice me.

"Hmmph. Thought I saw a cute little boy a second ago. Anyways, GET BACK TO WORK YOU LOUSY SCUMBAGS!"

"Yes ma'am!" The guards replied panicking and scrambling off down the stairs, failing to notice me.

"Hopefully this little incursion doesn't wake up my beloved onee-chan." She walked down the opposite direction and faded from sight.

With the white spector and her guards gone, I then rushed down the hallway towards what seemed to be the master chamber doors. The doors had an ominous atmosphere as it was aligned with twisted thorns and had whispers of agony emitting from its skull doorknobs.

I slowly creaked open the door and entered into the dimly lit master chamber. Inside, the large room was filled with wardrobes, desks and chairs, a room divider for changing, an elegantly adorned bed, and several trinkets lying amidst this cluttered, messy room.

I searched through the entirety of the room, frantically rummaging through the desks and wardrobes in futile hopes of finding this amulet. I couldn't fail this initiation. Otherwise, Circe would forever torment me as an incompetent drunk streaker…

Whilst searching through one of the wardrobes, I stumbled upon something glorious. In my hands, I held what seemed to be a magically infused lingerie set. The bra and panties glistened with a black aura in the beautifully vibrant moonlight shining in from the windows. My virgin male brain was overflowed with ecstasy as I held a girl's underwear for the first time.

What could I say? Any boy would do the same so might as well enjoy the moment. Plus, imagine how much I could make selling this to a romantically repressed prince or noble.

I tucked the bra and panties in my cloak as I proceeded to investigate the rest of the room. I noticed that there was a girl fast asleep, whose neck the green amulet hung around. I approached the bed and leaned over to carefully to retrieve the amulet.

However, just as I grabbed the amulet, the girl inadvertently grabbed me and threw me next to her as she turned in bed. I lay there, snuggled face to face with a fair snowy haired woman. My face became just as red as a tomato at the sight of her delicate sleeping face and the touch of her hands around my torso.

I should really be getting back to the guild with the amulet. But hey, I was snuggling with a beautiful girl who just happened to grab me. They can wait a couple of minutes while I enjoy myself.

She slowly opened her eyes a few moments later to see my delightfully smug face looking back at her.

"Evening gorgeous... Name's Koman. What's yours?"

She recoiled in response to me, instantly taking her hands off of me and covering herself with the blanket.

"What the hell are you doing in my bed!"

I laid there seductively with one hand on my waist and another on my face.

"Well, couldn't help it when you're the one who pulled me in bed." I teased playfully. I was essentially goading death at this point, but I couldn't help but give into my romantically direct nature.

She then began to form a dark magic blade with her flat hand and sliced at me.

"OH GOD!" I frantically rolled out of the bed to avoid getting sliced in two.

"Okay maybe a bit too far. Can we just talk this out? I'm sure it's all just a huge misunderstanding."

She saw that I held the amulet in my hands as I slowly backed towards the door.

"How dare you just barge into my room! You'll soon rue the moment you looted my belongings and desecrated my sacred body with your lewd gaze!

The white haired lady fired a barrage of dark projectiles that cut off my escape towards the door and pinned me to the wall as well.

She slowly walked out to me, in a very revealing one-piece, with a long dark void blade in hand that scraped across the ground.

Damn even in this situation, I can't help but admire those slim hips and gorgeously white long hair she had. That one-piece sure does compliment her sexy physique. Wait, compliments! THAT'S IT!

Just as she raised her blade to finish me, I exclaimed to her surprise, "I was just mesmerized by the sight of your heavenly body! Clearly, you're a lady whose divine beauty surpasses even the goddesses of this world. I knew from the moment I saw your angelic face and glistening white hair, I was in love with a fallen angel.

"Wait, you think I'm beautiful?" She lowered her sword and shyly looked down. "To say that to an unmarried girl and immediately profess that you lo-lo-love her..." She began to break down at the thought of my profoundly passionate and direct confession.

Excellent, just as planned. As a genius like me knows, things like compliments, chocolate, and expensive gifts are the achilles heels of women. With this opportunity, I activated my staff to free myself and clumsily swung at her legs, knocking her to the ground.

I rushed out towards the balcony but the scantily dressed lady pulled at my leg, toppling me onto to the ground.

She straddled herself onto me to deliver a flurry of blows as she fell into a flustered rage. Wait… is she crying?

"How dare you! I actually thought you genuinely liked me for a second. What rogue thinks he can play with a woman's emotions like that?! Die you stupid pervert!"

I desperately blocked her barrage of blows with my staff. As she tried to pummel me into submission, her swaying motion began to increase whilst she was straddled on top of me. And before I knew it…

"Oh you have an emergency dagger on you? Well then, it soon will be your undoing."

"NO WAI-"

She thrusted her hand and grabbed this _extra dagger._

The girl paused for a second realizing her dreaded mistake. Whelp, if it wasn't standing before, it certainly is now.

We then looked into each other eyes with embarrassed stares for a few moments as we both realized what exactly just happened.

"…"

"…"

She quickly sprang backwards off of me upon that realization. "EEEKKK! Why the hell are you like that in the middle of a fight! You truly are some type of elite sexual harasser!"

"Not my fault! You kept swaying on my hips! It's a natural male physiological reaction!"

I then rushed, with a blushing face, towards the balcony's edge as my eternal shame had provided my escape opening.

"Wait, I'm not done with you yet! I'm going to make you pay for all the horrible things you did to me, especially you pointing me with your " _spare_ " dagger. YOU HEAR ME!" the lady said whilst clutching herself, clearly traumatized by my " _pointing_ ".

On top the balcony's rail, I turned to bid this emotionally distraught lady good-bye with the amulet hung around my neck. Might as well have the last laugh.

"Farewell my easily tricked maiden! Just take comfort in knowing you were played by the rogue genius, Koman Takeda! Until next... Whoa Whoa…. AAAHHH!"

A sudden gust of wind blew past me. I then lost my balance and fell of the rail before I was done talking and especially before I created the parachute meant to help me get down.

The lady leaned over the edge to watch me as I escaped her clutches.

"You'll regret the day you ever toyed with the emotions of Elise, the Arch Priestess of Misery! I'll make you suffer every excruciating moment of your demise. I'll never forget you, Koman the perverted sexually harassing rogue!"

Ah. Girls angrily shouting my name accompanied with verbal threats, brings back memories.

When I suddenly realized again I was about to die, I reached for my Sozo box and desperately thought the first thing that came to mind which could save my life right now.

Just in time, the Sozo box glowed and created before me… the Beach Loli Contest Banner that was at the anime convention I went to a few weeks before dying horribly. _Hooray_?

I then barely clutched the banner in the air to catch the breeze and sure enough, the banner prevailed.

Below me, the fifty so Crimson Roses were effortlessly contending to the hordes around them. Some of the more cocky members were sitting in groups talking to one another, chatting in circles as they off-handedly destroyed the few minions brave enough to approach. Honestly, it seemed like the guild far outclassed anything that was stationed at this remote fort.

Upon seeing the amulet and the loli banner in the night sky, Circe, with a confused expression, signalled all of the Crimson Roses around her to move back to the rendezvous point.

As the loli banner safely landed into a tree, I fell down, exhausted from using the box.

Looking down Circe noted my accomplishment. "Nice job Koman. You managed to keep all your clothes this time."

Circe then carried me on her back to the rendezvous point where everyone was already waiting. She then recited the incantation once everyone was in the teleportation radius.

And like that we vanished from that desolated wasteland.

Once back at the town square, Circe dropped me and inquired where the amulet was.

Weak from the box and her sudden drop, I tiredly held an amulet in the air to answer her question. Don't know what's for. Don't really care. Don't have to deal with anymore guild interviews. That's all I care about.

She smiled. "A job well done. You passed your guild member test. You're apparently not completely incompetent after all."

"But wait there's more."

With the little energy I had left, I pulled out my additional bounty.

"Behold. A divine treasure amongst the mortal men of this realm."

I weakly waved the enchantedly glowing bra and panties in the air for all to see.

A roar of cheers from the male Crimson Roses erupted, elated at the sight of my heroic action for all of mankind.

Circe covered her face in disgust simply stating.

"Nevermind. You are a complete imbecile, little brother…"


	8. Chapter 2 Part 3

**Part 3:**

After my successful initiation into the guild, life certainly changed for me in the past two weeks.

I was official a member of the Order of the Crimson Rose, though I had to take several part-time jobs to pay off rent and living expense…

"Order 6 with a side of extra frog legs!" I was in a waiter's uniform in a nearby tavern serving dishes during the lunch rush. "There you go Ma'am. Would you like me to get anything else?"

"No thank you. That would be all." I then rushed back in the kitchen to attend to the dozens of other orders piling in on me.

After the lunch rush died down, I switched my uniform to a more comfortable outfit as I went to do work as a clerk's assistant in a nearby shop.

Then as a delivery boy.

Then as… well basically this continued for quite a while. I was a bit too enthusiastic about the whole jobs thing. Well, if I'm going to be a common plebeian, might as well be the best one right?

Despite the overwhelming part time jobs, I was still a Crimson Rose. As a member of such a guild, I received all the glorious benefits attached to such a highly-regarded role.

"KOMAN! My glass of lemonade is empty. Mind if you refill my cup, little brother?"

I walked into Circe's living room in full maid attire. "Yes Circe…" I grabbed her cup and refilled it with freshly made lemonade.

"That's yes Onee-chan Senpai Circe to you. Absolutely refreshing! Nothing is as great as being served by a doting servant."

"Now remember you still have to sweep the entire lower floor okay?"

"The entire lower floor? But you live in a mansion! I mean absolutely… what else would I want to do but serve you…"

"I knew you wouldn't let your onee-chan down." She smiled with a overly smug face .

Despite my toils as Circe's doting little brother, I did plenty of amazing acts fit for a hero like me.

I got to display my extensive magical power prowess to Circe in training sessions.

"Alright Koman, utilizing your mana and activating your scythe is literally attainable by children. You can do it!"

"Okay, here goes nothing." I concentrated all of my will-power in this task. Piece of cake.

I was astonished as I got … half of the scythe's blade to activate… after 5 minutes of concentration.

"I see that you're impressed! I can tell by the surprised look on your face."

"Impressed for the wrong reasons Koman… impressed for the wrong reasons…" Circe held her face in her hands.

I got to slay fearsome beasts that were formidable to even to the most elite of warriors.

"C'mon Koman! They're just cabbages! Any adventurer can take down food in this world."

The pack of flying cabbages swarmed around me.

Yep… flying cabbages… I couldn't be making this up if I wanted to. The food of this world was apparently alive and sentient.

They began barraging me with a flurry of blows.

"Since when does food fight back?! OW! OW! OW!"

I fell to the ground as the cabbages dog-piled me. They continue attack and leave multiple bruise marks on me as I attempted to slowly crawl away from their clutches.

I was carted off to the guild's arch priests who giggled uncontrollably as they healed my vegetable beaten body.

And most of all, I got the prestigious recognition I truly deserved…

"Autographs! Once in a life opportunity to get autographs from a certified Crimson Rose! Don't miss out!" I shouted out at a stand to give out my printed portraits.

"Wait, aren't you the person who got locked up for running buck naked into the Springtime festival?" A shopkeeper inquired.

A passing lady remarked, "I heard about that fellow. He had to be restrained by 5 knights as they carted him off to the slammer."

"I still remember all the jokes and nicknames we made for that idiot streaker. Can we get an autograph from the renowned " _Short-sword Wonder"?"_ One of the other townspeople stated.

"Autographs? What autographs? I'm not giving autographs!" I then proceeded to forcefully smile at the crowd as I ripped up my portraits and walked on home.

"Despite all these hardships, I am slowly ascending to become the hero that defeats the Demon King. Quite a fascinating story right?"

The lady across the tavern table had her eyes wavering between close and open as she desperately stay awake during my story. "Oh you're still here… Yes that was absolutely amazing, Kirito."

"It's Koman…"

"Yeah that's what I said. Truly captivating! You are certainly one of the most incredible adventurers to ever pass by this town. I would love for you to come by again with more tales of your adventures. And that will be 2,000 Eris please."

I reached in my wallet and deposited 2,000 Eris into the lady's hand.

I got up and left the table as the lady called on her next client.

"The next adventurer in line!"

A knight in blue armor sat down and began his tale, "I'm visiting from a faraway town as a little vacation from my heroic adventures." The girl leaned in, clearly faking interest in the knight's monologue.

"Fascinating, please do go on!"

"Very well. My epic tale began when the divine goddess Aqua gave me my treasured cursed blade…"

Aqua the Toilet Goddess? I see she sent other heroes here after all. Pffft. Divine relic chumps.

Though...paying bar-tender ladies to listen to my stories at the end of each day… what has my life become? I was getting absolutely nowhere.

The next morning I woke up to start my usual day.

I got up from my messy bed, brushed my teeth, and read one of my light novels for a bit.

As I spent the passing days in this world, I brought in several creature comforts to pass the time here.

These mainly consisted of an array of light novels, several varieties of snack foods, posters of my favorite anime girls, and best of all, an ice chest for my beverages.

Apparently, the Sozo box did grant things I wanted from back home. However, it appears to drain ever more energy the large or more useful an object is. As I learned two weeks before...

"Alright let's get a whole fridge up in here." I attempted to conjure the item, but just passed out cold, hitting the desk and falling to the floor.

Yeah. Let's not repeat that.

So I have become content using the Sozo box for more basic pleasures like catching up on my light novel series and the occasional food item during the past two weeks.

I got dressed in my stunning Crimson mage attire, the gleaming black hooded cloak, a black and red shirt, and black pants. All signature trademarks of a certified badass. I left my necklace gift on the table though. I pondered slightly as I felt its eerie presence.

Just who was that blonde girl anyways? Her illuminating yellow eyes and vibrant aura was apparently unknown to even the goddess who sent me here. I'll see you on the other side, my _shining knight_? Just what exactly did she mean? I discarded the thought as it bothered me.

Whilst drinking a soda can from the cooler, I walked down the stairs of the guild lodge to go off and see if there was any quests available.

"Morning, Helena. Want to hear about my recent escapades as a Crimson Rose?"

"Ehh sounds interesting. Perhaps another time Koman. I'm working."

Two Crimson Rose members walking through the hall stopped to notice me.

"Hey it's the rookie! Still can't activate your weapon? HAHAHA! What a joke!"

"Bet you the only reason why he's even still part of the guild is because Circe loves having maid to dote on her. Bet he looks amazing cleaning her mansion in a maid uniform. Isn't that right Koman?"

I fumed angrily in my mind.

"You know what Helena? I'll take an Medium quest today, just to show these extras what a real Crimson Rose looks like."

"MEDIUM Quest?! Pffft. Whatever floats your boat, _Short-Sword Wonder_! Later!"

I reached over to accept the quest on the newsboard, suddenly noticing that there was another delicate hand besides mine.

"Mind if you let a new person in town take this quest? That would really be kind of you." The female stranger said with a soft and delicate voice.

She was dressed in a vibrant silver and violet robe that cut off at her thighs and was equipped with a bow and quiver on her back and a short blade holstered on her belt. She had a slim figure that was complimented by her long flowing brown hair.

"No can do."

"Thank you so much. What a gentleman you are. Wait... did you just say no?

"I would normally be a gentleman and hand over the quest, but seeing as my ego is at risk, I'm going to ask you to decline the quest."

"What excuse is that? Anyways, I really insist you decline the quest."

"Not going to happen... besides there's no reason to just hand you the quest."

"What about common decency! After all, isn't it ladies first?"

"What about all the guys out there? You can't just impose your unrealistic expectations and get away with it!"

This female stranger and I continued butted heads and struggled to push one another away from the quest form.

Noticing the uncontent line forming behind us, Helena exclaimed, "It's decided! You'll both go on the quest together as a party!"

"HUH?"

"HUH?"

The quest form began to magically inscribe both of our names on the paper and sealed them in burnt letters.

"Hold up. I didn't sign up to be with an annoying prick."

"You're not exactly an angel yourself…"

"The golem is extremely hard to find even by most skilled of trackers as it likes to blend in with its surroundings. So, it should be perfect for someone like you Koman. Whether you guys like each other or not, you two have to complete the quest together or pay the failure fee of 100,000 Eris. Anyways, here's a bag for the quest. Got to get back to work. Good luck!"

I turned to see an equally dissatisfied girl with her arms crossed with the bag in her hands and looking straight at me.

"Well, what now?"

I sighed and held out my hand. "Might as well get this done. I'm guessing you got other places to be besides with this handsome devil."

"Why would I want to be anywhere else but with you?" She smirked a bit and begrudgingly extended her hand to loosely shake mine.

And with that we were off, forced together on the same quest despite our previous protests.


	9. Chapter 2 Part 4

**Part 4:**

After a long, quiet trek from the town and into the depths of the nearby forest, I read the quest form in complete boredom as the girl seemed wholly intent on reading the little notebook in her hand. Just what exactly was she reading?

"Level 30 Truffle Oil-infused Potato Golem on the outskirts of the town. Tastes amazing when sliced and fried into wedges. Reward: 500,000 Eris. Sounds nice."

She put her book away in her pouch."More pleasant than being forced on a co-op quest right? At least I presume so."

I grinned a bit. This girl is certainly the more slick type, I can work with that...

"Okay, I have only one key rule if you're ever working with me. Never try to deceive me. Got it?" She seemed suddenly more serious.

Her violet eyes glowed sparkle with a cold violet flicker and hints of red sparking out whilst saying this comment. In her eyes, a fiery intensity burned, one that seemed to rival even Circe's vibrant red eyes during my initiation. Perhaps this girl was more than she appeared to be. Her sleek outfit and relatively cool demeanor seemed to entail so.

"Anyways, we best split up to find the golem faster. Hold onto this so that we can keep in touch…Press the button on the talisman if you run into the golem."

She casually tossed me a glowing talisman and began to walk off in another direction.

Nice I can just ditch the talisman and get the reward all for myself. Heh Heh Heh.

Once she was clearly out of sight, I laid the talisman on the ground and walked a few meters. All I found though were boulders.

I proceeded to turn and walk in another direction in hopes of finding the golem. However, I tripped on a pebble.

"OW OW OW! That freaking hurts!" I exclaimed as I bruised my knee. Though a minor injury, it hurted a lot due to the non-existent damage resistance I had.

The commotion of my loud complaints seem to stir the boulders. No wait. It stirred the ground near the boulders. The ground began part in two before me.

Awoken from its dirt slumber, the 10 ft potato golem towered above me . The shiny brown golem seemed to be made of individual potatoes that compiled together to form a humanoid structure. It had two stocky stubs for legs, two bulky arms with large hands, and a round head with red potatoes for eyes. Lastly, I noticed that it had a rectangular body with several golden potatoes making up a chest piece. A possible weak spot.

As I tried to frantically get up, I skillfully tripped on my cloak. Damn! These long cloaks are a lot more cumbersome than the light novels entail.

The golem swung his bulky arm down just barely a meter away from me, demolishing a nearby boulder. The boulder was reduced to mere pebbles at the impact of the one hit. That would certainly one-shot me if it landed.

Not wanting die another horrible death, I then proceeded to get up and run desperately as the golem chased me.

After a few minutes of constant running and some screaming through the forest, the golem and I stopped to catch our breath. The golem swayed back and forth disoriented until it fell onto its back, extremely exhausted.

Now's my chance!

I slowly shuffled my way towards the golem and weakly crawled onto its chest. It took a few moments as I struggled to get a grip on the individually moving potatoes.

Once I got my footing on the golem's chest, I stood before its weak spot, the golden potato chest piece.

I laughed sinisterly as I raised my scythe to finish off the golem and collect my reward before the girl could notice.

I tried to ignite the scythe several times, but all it did was sputter out sparks. Oh well, just going have hit the weak spot really hard then.

But my arms were weakly wobbling in the air. Probably due to the intense fatigue I was feeling after running so much. My arms then suddenly gave out and my arms fell, dropping the staff on my head and knocking me out.

I woke up to find myself in a pile of potatoes and a very mad girl aiming her bow at me.

"NICE! You defeated the golem. I was just about to inform you that I found the golem But alas…"

"Tried running off with the reward alone?" She interrupted, looking extremely pissed.

Alright let's diffuse the situation. "Absolutely yes, without a doubt."

Shit!

She scoffed and aimed her bow a bit lower.

"WOAH WOAH WOAH! Now let's not be hasty!"

"Because? Give me one reason to trust a deceitful, crying piece of trash like you?"

"You look very beautiful?"

She placed foot on my neck and I struggled to breathe. To be honest though, her dominance of me was pretty hot and the view of her body was certainly not bad.

"Not going to work on someone like me… I've dealt with trash like you before."

"I can make it worth your while… if you just let me take off my clothes and..."

"Ew. Sorry. Like I said, not interested in trash men…"

"Definitely not what I meant! Plus you didn't let me finish! I was just going to give you something to make amends!"

"Above everything, I especially dislike people who think that they just toy with and disregard people's trust. But fine, go ahead. Surprise me."

She lifted her foot but still aimed her bow towards my lower regions. She looked at me with eyes that seemed full of distaste. And slight hint of pain? Her eyes seem to waver in their distaste of me.

I took off my cloak for a moment to pulled out my Sozo box as she watched curiously.

I thought really hard on something that would make sure girl wouldn't proceed to beat the shit out of me or worse fire an arrow in the more delicate areas...

Expensive gifts, that's it! C'mon think of something. Something a girl would want. Something that would make them forget all the stupid things a guy had done to them. Something that I had once wanted to give to a very special girl a long time ago...

With a vibrant glow, the Sozo box shined and created the item I had in mind. And laying in my extended hand, there sat a silver bracelet with a violet jewel as the crowning touch.

"Detect Traps." Her hand glowed white upon holding the item until it illuminated a green light a for moments later. She then wrapped it in a thick cloth and put it in her pouch. She looked at me with a slightly more reserved and questioning face.

She then helped me up. When I was back on my feet again she leaned in and mockingly said.

"No tricks up your sleeve. I see you're actually more thoughtful than you act after all. You decided to cut the bullshit faster than most con artists I have met. Perhaps I was a bit rash…"

Excellent. It worked kind of.

"In that case, we'll agree on a 75-25 split then? Sounds adequate to me. Don't you agree?"

My jaw dropped in complete awe.

I was mad but slightly drained from using the box. "Wait. I just gave you a priceless silver bracelet that means a lot to me! And in return, you just offered to take my share of the reward?"

"You did tried to scam me first. So it would be fitting to return the favor. Besides, wouldn't you do the same if you had the opportunity?"

She devilishly smirked at me.

Actually, yeah I would do the same… How ironic.

She pulled out a sack and tossed it to me.

"Here, these valuable potatoes aren't going to put themselves up after all. Besides, you don't seem cut out to actually fight monsters to be honest."

Still intimidated by her, I disregarded the comment and fumed silently as we picked up the potatoes.

Once I regained my resolve, I decided to put this strange girl in her place.

"Hold on. Why would someone as genius as me agree to put up these potatoes and only receive 25% of the reward?"

"Clearly I was the genius who found the golem first. And I was the one who exhausted it to the point of being taken out by any novice like you. Remind me again what idiot would agree to your outlandish demands?"

She rushed towards me with blinding speed and pulled out a short blade that was mere centimeters away from my neck.

"Oh I don't know. How about the "genius" in front of me? After all, I could always take 100% of the reward. She edged the blade closer. "Your move."

She looked straight into my eyes with an expression that screamed _What are you going to do about it?_

Why do women always have to have their way … Oh well there's only one choice.

"Now that you put it like that, I would love to split the reward 25-75 with you!"

"But first, what's your name by the way?" I asked gritting my teeth.

"You can just call me Scarlet. What's yours, my _intelligently challenged_ partner?"She teased in a mischievously condescending tone.

"Name's Koman. Pleasure to be of service." I began gritting my teeth even harder.

"Pleasure to have such an experienced " _gentleman_ " serve me." She threw the bag onto my shoulders. She then wrote in a little notebook of hers from before, though I couldn't see what she was writing. Once finished, she put the notebook away and left a trace of mystery as she briefly looked at me. For but a moment, she seemed insecure.

Just who was this girl?

And like that I begrudgingly dragged the large potato bag towards the guild lodge, behind her mysteriously quiet striding body, in the silence of defeat and curiosity.


	10. Chapter 2 Part 5

**Part 5:**

Upon walking back from the forest into the wide gates of the sparkling white city walls, I slowed down to a mere limp as I was exhausted from hauling the large potato sack across what seemed to be miles.

"Haa…Haa…! Can we stop here? My back and arms are killing me right now."

"Really… Can you not even lift a potato bag? Don't see one being a genius if he can't even do basic tasks..."

I fell onto the ground completely drained from the task.

"It's called working smarter not harder. I used to avoid such novice tasks,"

She nudged me to get up.

"Not yet."

"What is this, a intermission break?"

"Yes, I'm tired now. Let me rest. We'll go when I'm ready again."

She sighed. "Okay, I really don't have time for this…"

She picked up the potato bag and walked off casually with our shared quest prize.

"Hold on wait!" I briskly paced after her. Can't let her have it that easy.

She continued to walk down a main avenue and stopped suddenly at an intersection.

I was hunched over panting. "Finally you took the hint and stopped. It's almost like you wanted to run off with my share of the quest?"

"What share? I was the one who defeated the golem alone after all." She said this with a somewhat blank expression.

My eyes narrowed down as I gazed upon this girl. Was she just messing with me or was something else going on.

She looked in her notebook briefly and hastily said with renewed smugness, "Oh yeah the 75-25 deal we had. With the amount of effort you put into helping me in this quest, I just forgot that you actually did something worth even considering."

My patience in standing the ever-increasing sarcastic tone of this strange girl was certainly running out.

"Anyways… do you know which path leads back to the Lodge. We apparently took a different route than my usual one."

She looked in both directions of the road and paused for a moment."How would I know? This is my first day here. I just assumed the distinguished prodigy would be kind enough to assist a girl in need."

"I'm not your typical gullible white knight, Miss Scarlet. Besides, I just haven't been in this area yet, that's all. Might as well ask one of the townsfolk around for directions then." I started to walk towards a shopkeeper to ask for help.

Her face seemed to resent this idea and stopped me by grabbing my hand. "No, I think we should just pick a route. We don't need to ask directions from strangers. That would just be bothersome."

I looked "I can see why you're the smart one between us. Walking around aimlessly when we can just ask someone. What an amazing idea!" I finally had an opportunity to get back at this girl so I planned to take it.

She looked at me with a flaring temper. Her violet eyes with flickers of red appeared to ignite with a renewed vigour as she stomped her way towards me.

"If I recall correctly, I'm not the one who couldn't even activate his own weapon and knocked himself out in the middle of a fight." She began to make a mocking impression of me.

"You were watching the whole time? Way to help out your partner. I see you're just as scummy as you make me to be. What do you say about that?

"You little pompous son of…" She began to bubble with anger as she walked right up to me. Fantastic, I _always_ wanted to deal with girls with temper. When I first was told this was going to be a light novel world, I was looking forward to its splendor and fantastic cliches. So far all I got was part-time jobs, guild members that constantly ridicule me, and now a C-grade waifu who didn't even seem that appealing. What a wonderful world to live in...

She had her hand raised in a fist, but pulled back as she sighed deeply. She then took a step back and crossed her arms. "Look, we can argue all we want and get nowhere. Not like I would prefer to bear another moment with some pretentious guy. Now, I would insist we find something to do other than asking someone around…it would be better that way…"

She avoided looking at my eyes as I stared confusingly at her. Odd, she calmed down. Though she didn't appear to backing down anytime soon. For the sake of getting that reward faster, I'll step down and allow this girl to win for now.

"Fine, we won't ask strangers for directions… there are you happy now?"

She brushed aside her hair. "Hmmm. Trust me, it's better this way. People don't always live up to your expectations." She seemed to tap her foot rapidly as she said that while avoiding eye contact.

I briefly questioned the intent and reason of that statement.

"Let's take the left lane then shall we?"

I tried to put together what exactly made this girl tick as we walked down the lane.

As storm clouds began to form upon the cusp of night, we saw the guild lodge in the distance.

"See. I didn't need anyone to help me after all."

"You mean we didn't need anyone to help us? What's so bad about relying on people?"

She punched me in the gut.

"Yeah, that's what I said. We didn't need anyone's help. Now let's get going. The sooner we get our prize, the sooner we don't have deal with each other."

"Agreed. Next time, you don't have to punch me." I wheezed as I got up from the incredibly strong punch for a girl her size. Sometimes I forget this is a light novel world with all the mundanity of my world at times.

"Where would the fun be in that?"

Inside the adventurers guild room, Helena and Suzy presented us with our reward as we handed them the sack of truffle oil infused potatoes.

"Here's the reward for the quest, 500,000 Eris. Thank you so much for taking that quest."

"Yeah Helena and I have been dying to make some potato wedges and baked potatoes with these. I can already see the satisfied faces of our customers when we use this tomorrow night!"

Helena and Suzy turned their attention to me as I gave half of my portion to Scarlet.

"Wow, that's a first time we have ever seen Koman so generous. By the way, how did he treat you? We know that he can be a handful at times." Helena stated.

"What do you mean? I'm certainly the most generous Crimson Rose you know!"

"Doesn't help that we only know one Crimson Rose guild member. You're certainly the most interesting one. I still remember the time he took off his shirt and almost unzipped his pants the first night he met us." Suzy added.

Scarlet looked at me with a mixture of smugness and anticipation as she awaited my response to this testimony.

"Oh really? And I thought he was enough of a delinquent as is."

"Well just wait a second. The circumstances at the time were different. It's not like I was trying to be a degenerate…"

"Don't have to try when you're already a degenerate right?"

Helena and Suzy burst out giggling as I was completely flustered at Scarlet's comment.

"By the way, do you have any rooms available?"

"Unfortunately, all the rooms are taken and our worker dormitory is filled to the brim. Sorry about that."

"It's alright I will just depart onwards to the next city then."

"Anyways we got to get back to work. Keep an eye on this pesky rogue now, would you?"

"I suppose, though by the way things are looking, he'll certainly keep an eye on me. You probably know this boy's perverted antics better after all."

The two receptionist girls giggled more intensely as they walked away whilst hearing this.

This girl! I have never meet someone so adept in absolutely demolishing another person's ego so fast. It's astonishing just how slick she is able to do it as well.

"Alright, it's been nice meeting you, I guess, but I got to get going."

She abruptly grabbed my shoulder. She looked at the window then at me. This girl just doesn't know when to stop bothering me.

"I know this is much to demand, but… but will you le-le-let me …"

She seemed to almost puke upon saying the words, so it must be hard for her to say what she is about to say. Might as well prolong her suffering.

"What was that? My dumb degenerate ears couldn't catch that."

Her face welled up with a overwhelming coloration of red. I wonder how far I can take this little game.

"Will you le-le-let me stay..?"

"WHAT! I COULDN'T HEAR YOU! PLEASE SPEAK LOUDER!"

Her blazing eyes began to simmer at a low flame as if she was withdrawing all her immense anger and frustration inside as I continued to act the fool she proposed me to be.

She withdrew her hand as I turned my full attention to her slightly quivering self.

"C'mon you can use words right? You know the parts of language you use to speak with. It's a key to socializing with people."

"Oh trust me, if there's anyone who needs to learn to adequately socialize, it would be you." She appeared to want to bang her head into a wall with the amount of indecision she was displaying. "Will you let me stay the night?" She clenched her fist and gritted her teeth as hard as she can as she uttered those words slowly with clearly visual discomfort.

"Wait what."

The drops of the rain rang into my ears and I heard the distant roar of the thunder outside the pub. It was heavily pouring outside with no clear sign of ceasing.

She paused as if she forgot what she was about to say. She then skimmed through her notebook briefly which she put away after finding what she wanted. "I was going to depart onwards to the next town, but there's a thunderstorm outside. Since I have no other place to go, so I thought it would be best to stay with you."

My face turned a massive grin. "Oh how the mighty have fallen. I suppose I can lend my indispensable assistance to you. Of course for a price."

Scarlet broke her reserved state and bluntly said with a renewed coldness. "No, you're not getting a peek at my undies or anything of the sort. I would rather be a fool who gets defeated by cabbages than have some guy have his way with me. Plus I would most likely beat the shit out of you if you tried."

"How dare you. I would never do anything of the sorts. Also, for your information, cabbages are fearsome foes." My face blushed at her direct verbal attack on my self-worth as a human being.

"Sure they are. Anyways, what's your price then?"

Hmm what was my price? Money is nice but I didn't come to this world just to make cash. I was a bit lonely as I only have Circe as a very annoying sister. Honestly, I just wanted to go on the whimsical adventures with a rag-tag group of companions. That way I can eventually make the toilet goddess suffer. Hmm.

I stuck my head upward whilst saying, "Fine, I'll let you stay the night only if you let me tag along on one of your quests. That's all I will ask. Besides, I'm not the type to make a girl uncomfortable or empty her hard earned money when she needs help."

Her face began to shift from the frustration to slight approval.

"Maybe you're not a degenerate after all. Though, I would have preferred anything else than to be with you. Guess I have no choice. Alright then, sure you can tag along I suppose."

"Can you quit the whole degenerate thing? It's starting to annoying me."

As she started to make her way out of the guild hall into the main lobby she smugly said, "Now where would the fun in that be?"

We then walked upstairs the guild lodge and into my room.

"Tada. Welcome to the room of a Crimson Rose. It's not much but hey it's home."

She looked puzzlingly at my somewhat messy room that was filled with japanese light novels, foods, and products scattered across the medium-sized room.

My light novels were cluttered on my table and anime girl posters were on the wall. Shit. I forgot to hide those. Oh well.

"Why do you have 12-years girls in vibrantly bright colored clothing posted all over your walls? Also… why is there so many scantily clothed women on the cover of your books?"

"You want to stay the night or do you prefer to sleep in the rain?

"I would prefer to stay the night as one with a brain would. A bit hard for you to imagine I would assume."

"Then stop judging my life choices. Gosh you sound a lot like my mother with all the constant nagging and subtle insults."

She slightly chuckled at my comment.

"Anyways. You can take a shower in the bathroom first while I clean up the room. I am a gentleman after all." I tossed her a towel.

"You better not try to do anything perverted with me tonight or…" She pulled out her short sword and made a slicing motion at the crotch.

I gulped. "Why would I do that? A man of honor such as myself wouldn't even dare peek at a maiden whilst she is in revealing attire."

"Something about the way you said that makes me think you have done something of the sorts."

Damn what kind of insight does she have to know that? Though the castle scene wasn't intentional, for the most part, so that doesn't count.

"Just hurry up and don't use all the hot water. I especially hate the despicable people that steal all the hot water from their roommates."

She walked in the bathroom as I cleaned up my room.

After we both took a shower, we dressed in our sleeping attire and got ourselves for bed. I wore some fuzzy red cotton pajama set that came nicely with a sleeping cap. Scarlet wore a worn out pair of silver and violet pajamas that matched her adventurer attire. Not as sexy as that one Arch Priestess's one-piece, but still good-looking nevertheless.

I pulled out my spare futon that I sometimes used as extra comfortable padding to sleep on the floor while Scarlet got to sleep in my normal bed. As gentleman would do for a lady.

Scarlet seemed to be writing some notes in her notebook again while she was sitting upright on the bed. What was with this girl and constantly looking at her notebook?

"What do you even write in that notebook anyways?" I said while sitting up from my futon.

She snapped out of what seemed to be a trance and turned to me, realizing after a couple of moments that I was talking to her.

She shifted uncomfortably at the mention of her notebook. "Oh, it's nothing to worry about. I suppose you can call it a little journal of mine. Though I would think you're more familiar with reading more lewd books noting the sheer amount of girls posted on your walls.

"Oi. I told you to stop that if you wanted to stay."

"And just what are you going to do about it? Hit yourself on the head again?"

"FOR YOUR INFORMATION…"

I stopped to notice her face trying to suppress the laughter welling up in laughter. I then furiously ranted on as she began to giggle uncontrollably. Her constant joking was getting on my nerves.

"With all facts about your _wholesome_ habits aside, thank you. I appreciate you letting me stay the night Koman." Her words seemed genuine, a refreshing change from the heaps of sarcasm and condescending remarks she made so far. Her eyes twinkled with a more calm and tranquil violet, as mesmerizing as the spring night sky back at home.

"Don't mention it. Actually mention it a lot. I'm a genius in the making after all. Feel free to lay as much praise as you desire."

"Duly noted Koman. Anyways good night." She tucked herself in and turned to the wall.

"Good night Scarlet."

I tucked myself in and began to stare at the wall in contemplation.

She's not bad, as long as she isn't constantly barraging me with insults.

Additionally, I was about to go on an adventure with this mysterious girl across a fantasy world.

No more part-time at the pub. No more ridicule from the people around me. No more scraping by as a nobody.

I get to now realize my dream for once in my life.

Things are finally looking up. I suppose. Though I have been wrong before...

I closed my eyes in anticipation of the certainly interesting beginning to come.


	11. Chapter 3 Part 1

**Chapter 3: A Quest for an Adventurer and His mysterious partner:** **Part 1:**

My eyes slowly opened as the morning light shone through my window.

Oh yeah. Today's is supposed to be a new beginning.

I sluggishly crawled out of bed and got up to stretch my body as I normally do at the beginning of a new day.

Looking over towards my bed, I saw it neatly clean up and done as if room service just came in. I didn't see any trace of Scarlet anywhere.

I picked up a light novel and read to distract myself for yet another disappointment in this fantasy world. I could have traveled on a whimsical adventure...

I guess I can stop by Circe's mansion for some extra training today. Circe did promise going to teach me something important today.

The bathroom door swung open to my surprise. Wait what?

I looked up to see Scarlet stepped out the restroom whilst drying her hair with a towel. Her long flowing brown hair glistened as the sunlight hit the dews of water resting on her head.

Scarlet's slim body was highlighted by the tight silver and violet robe that she wore and her toned legs were revealed as the robe stopped at her knees. She truly did look like a sexy badass when I thought about it.

Huh. She was still here though. Weird.

"Hurry up. We have a long day ahead of us. You wanted to join up with me after all, right?"

I smirked in response. She kept her promise. "I'm surprised you didn't take off in the morning and never had to deal with such a gentleman as myself ever again."

"Unlike a certain degenerate that's in front of me, I keep my promises. I suggest you do the same if you want people to trust you. Besides, I wanted to see you suffer a bit."

"What do you mean?"

"Well… I used all the hot water this morning, leaving all the nice refreshing cold water for you."

I fell to my knees in shock. "YOU MONSTER!"

After taking a miserable cold shower, I looked in the mirror to see my reflection. I saw a tall, slim boy whose wet long spiky hair was hanging downwards.

His glasses highlighted his brown eyes and his bright confident smile illuminated the room. He was pretty good-looking and slick if I do say so myself.

I got dressed in my black and red Crimson Rose attire. A hero can't go wrong in black after all. I equipped the Sozo box on my belt and grabbed my spare backpack.

I then glanced at the dreaded necklace that I was gifted with. Just who was that blonde girl and how did she get ahold of that necklace? I wore it on with reluctance. Whether I liked it or not, that necklace was a part of me after all...

After finishing my morning routine, I stepped out of my bathroom to see Scarlet reading one of my light novels, sitting upright with her legs crossed.

"Oi, can you not go through my stuff." I grabbed the book out of her hands.

"What? You were taking so long trying to make yourself look bad-ass."

She grabbed my cloak. "Let's be candid, a black outfit? Edgy much? Not that it will help you look any cooler."

My face slightly twitched at this comment but I knew better than to argue. I can always do that later.

"Alright Koman, I need to locate a high-level mage named Circe. I heard she lives somewhere around the vicinity."

"Oh Circe. I know where she lives. I can take you to her."

"Really? You know where the highly-praised Circe the Sorceress lives? That's surprising. I guess you can be actually useful."

"When have I not been useful Scarlet?"

"I can think of a couple of times."

I questioned sarcastically. "Interesting though… you are telling me where you're going without me asking. Could it be that you actually trust me?"

Scarlet threw an arrow that flew right past my shoulder and into the wall. I gulped. "Trust me, I don't. But for now, I will allow you to accompany me. Could use you as bait if needed."

"What a partner…"

She grabbed the arrow and put it back in her quiver. "Why are your my partner again?" Again with that blank expression.

"Who's the one who let you stay the night again? I think his name starts with 'K' and ends with 'oman'?"

Scarlet face lit up in a sarcastic manner. "Oh yeah! Amazing that you almost remember how to say your own name. I suppose you were the one who let me stay... lead the way, _partner._ "

We walked down into main lobby where I approached the receptionist girls at the counter.

"I will be out a while on a quest with Scarlet. Can you keep track of my room in the meantime?" I was about to place some coins on the counter. However, Helena folded my hand and pushed it towards me.

"You don't need to pay Koman. Consider this as our thanks to you for being here. You did help us with a lot of chores in the past weeks. We'll keep your room nice and tidy."

"Yay silly, we got you covered. You are our favorite and most entertaining client after all! Just try to have a good time with your lady!" Suzy winked at me.

Scarlet frowned at Suzy's comment but didn't interject surprisingly.

I felt my heart warm up at the genuinely kind words said to me.

"Are you crying?" Scarlet began to tease me. "Does the little hero need a hug?"

"No, just sweating through my eyes." I sniffled. "C'mon let's go."

We bid the two receptionists farewell and walked towards the door as Helena and Suzy exclaimed. "Good Luck! Behave you two!"

I then lead Scarlet out of the Adventurer Guild Lodge, down a couple of streets, and towards what was an elegant manor in the elite part of town. It was surrounded by lush green fields and had illustriously beautiful white walls lining the perimeter.

We walked into the elegant three story manor. It was a vast estate, complete with many pieces of framed artwork and expensive decorations that radiated a sense of awe.

"As you can see, I train only with the best."

Scarlet rolled her calm violet eyes.

Scarlet noticed as my custom made male maid uniform was lying on the coat rack.

"So that's the type of training you do with the best? I'm impressed."

"Shut it. I don't just do maid work. You'll see."

I lead Scarlet from the main room into an office room.

There was Circe sitting in her chair, with her feet propped on the desk in front of her and talking to a magical hologram that she held in her left hand. "Yes darling! It's been great catching up! I will make my way there. See you soon. Bye." She ended her conversation and turned towards me.

"Ah. Koman! It's good to see you again." Circe rushed to hug me. She seized me in her immense grip as she hugged me tightly like a 5-year old would to their favorite doll. She's a bit too affectionate at times.

"GAH! That's enough Circe! Stop trying to suffocate me with your huge boobs!"

"Can't help it. I'm just blessed with these divine things." She lifted her large, firm boobs that bounced as she released them. "Though it's a killer on my back. What can I do for you?"

"I was wondering if you can give me one last training session before I lead off on a quest."

Circe looked to see Scarlet standing behind me, who was apparently writing in her notebook as she noted the magical objects in the office.

"I didn't know they had mystic dragon emblems in this part of the kingdom. I believe you can enchant your attacks to be far greater than the standard version using them."

"I'm surprised you know that. What's your name by the way?"

Scarlet turned with wary eyes and with a hint of defiance said. "It's Scarlet. Are you Circe?"

"Why yes I am! The 2nd Highest-ranking Crimson Rose leader, a talented mage, and a brother-con at your service. Pleasure to make your acquaintance." Circe and Scarlet briefly shook hands.

Circe held the object in her hand, noticing Scarlet's cold gaze.

"Well Scarlet, it's just that dragon emblems are not very well-known artifacts. Most people who are aware of them just think that they're just nice trinkets to own. You're certainly an inquisitive and bright individual." She then placed it back where it belonged.

Scarlet smiled shortly at this comment before seeing Circe walk towards me.

With clearly radiant joy, Circe punched me in the shoulder. "Nice job! You managed to catch a girl's attention. And she's the smart type too! My precious little Koman growing up!" She pinched my cheeks to which I tried to stop in a futile effort.

Scarlet slightly blushed but interjected, "Trust me, if it wasn't for the circumstances, I wouldn't come close to this hooligan."

"Oh, of course. I would think any reasonable person wouldn't, especially what he pulled off? Right _Short-Sword Wonder_?"

"Oi! You don't have to constantly degrade my worth as a person you know!"

The two both exclaimed in sync. "Where would the fun be in that?"

Great, now I have the two demonic women I know, together as a duo to endlessly torment me.

"Anyways, it's been nice seeing you two today as I was soon about to make my way out on some official business."

"In that case, I'll get to the point. I need… I need your help with something." Scarlet displayed a tone of reluctance as she struggled to utter those simple words.

"Of course darling! Anything for my future sister-in-law."

Scarlet frowned at Circe estatically smiling face whilst I blushed furiously.

REALLY CIRCE!? She always has to embarrass me in front of everyone. It's almost like she really was my big sister.

Scarlet approached Circe with her back turned to me, not seeming to want me to see what she was doing. With a hushed tone she asked, "Do you know where I can find _whisper whisper whisper_?"

"Do you mean this thing honey?"

I glanced to see Circe create a mystic hologram in her hand. It appeared to a flask of aqua blue liquid that fizzed and bubbled like a volcano. Wisps and vapors flew out of the opening revealing what possibly was people's dreams and nightmares.

"Oh, I see you need that little thing. I know exactly where you can find just such an object. But first, I might as well teach Koman one last key thing before I leave since I promised him I would today."


	12. Chapter 3 Part 2

**Part 2:**

Circe lead the two of us through the manor and towards the garden grounds of the estate.

On the open grounds of the manor's elegant garden fountain square, Circe began her lesson with me as Scarlet munched on a ham sandwich and wrote in her journal in the background.

"So far, I have been training you physical combat and mana control using monsters as targets and sources of experience. Surprisingly, it's not going so well as you are still only level 5. Funny enough, I haven't mentioned yet a key part of a class. That is that each class has a skill tree."

"As you level up Koman, you can gain skill points to unlock abilities and spells of your class. As a level 5 rogue, you have 5 points to unlock the following skills, Steal for 1, Sense Enemy for 1, and Shadowstep for 5. Choose carefully as you don't have enough points to unlock all of them."

Hmm. What skill do I want? Steal is most likely a typical one item snatch. Would be nice for stealing certain clothing though. Sense Enemy is usually just a detection spell. That means it won't help me in an actual fight. Interestingly, I haven't ever heard of Shadowstep before in my light novels.

"I'm curious. What's Shadowstep?"

"Good question Koman. It's a useful skill that utilizes the shadows and dark energies around the user. Shadowstep simply allows you to blink a short distance in and out of combat towards any direction you want. However, it's hard to master completely due to its unpredictable nature."

Shadowstep eh? It did really sound like an awesome ability. Shadowstep seemed to be versatile, powerful tool that left freedom to experiment while requiring immense skill to use. Perfect for a genius.

"Sounds fitting for an expert like me. I'll learn Shadowstep then."

"You, an expert? Tell that to the cabbages."

"Cabbages? Wait, you actually lost to a pack of cabbages? Can't believe..."

"THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW! Anyways, I would love to learn Shadowstep so I can teach this girl not to constantly insult me."

"Not like it's going to help." She continued to munch on her sandwich.

"Shadowstep eh? Interesting choice, my kouhai. Alright, pull out your adventurer card and tap on where it says Shadowstep."

I pulled out my adventurer card and pressed on the skill Shadowstep. I felt a sudden sensation as if my cells and molecules were being rearranged. All five of my points went to this skill.

"Excellent. Now let's have a little practice match with you utilizing your new ability. Would your friend Scarlet like to participate in my stead?

Scarlet hopped down from the rail she was sitting on. "With pleasure."

"Wait. You're not going to practice with me?

"Heavens no. It will be much more enjoyable to watch you two bond over fighting each other. I even got the snacks and chair ready. Besides, quality child combat entertainment is hard to find these days."

With a flick of the wrist, Circe sat in a comfortable lounge chair with a bowl of frog legs in hand.

I nervously looked at Scarlet as she prepared to fight me. She readied her bow and sword and casually turned towards me with a smirk on her face. Shit, this isn't going to end well.

With her mouth stuffed with frog leg meat, Circe said, "On the count of three, begin the match."

Alright, time to prove to this condescending girl who's really in charge.

"ONE, TWO, THREE!"

"Shadowstep!"

I blinked… exactly one foot in front of me. This might take some practice.

"Snipe!"

Scarlet fired an arrow that barely missed me, created a path through my hair instead.

"HEY, WATCH THE HAIR! IT'S A PRACTICE SESSION!"

"And? Am I supposed to just avoid hitting your hair at all costs? You can't just impose your unrealistic expectations and get away with it. Right Koman?"

Using my own words against me… this girl doesn't stop.

Scarlet proceeded to fire more arrows in my direction.

I frantically ran up the garden steps and behind a tree to avoid the barrage of arrows. Scarlet continued firing at me, exclaiming, "What a dissatisfying sparring match! At least make it somewhat of a fight!"

I peeked behind cover to notice Scarlet put away her bow and pull out her blade.

She snickered. "This should be child's play."

Scarlet then dashed towards my position with a blinding speed. The same move she did on the potato quest. Shit. I pulled out my staff. I decided to flip the script on her by moving towards her instead of retreating.

"Shadowstep."

I blinked right in front of her, much to her and my surprise. Shit! I meant to blink behind her. Whelp. This is going to hurt.

We tumbled over each other as I collided into her body at such a fast speed.

After tumbling down the garden steps, I landed on top of her. Realizing my opportunity to win, I pinned her hands down before she could react.

This seemed like a position a bit too similar with a certain girl who was on top of me in a certain castle…

I blushed extremely at the thought of this position.

And apparently, so did Scarlet as shown by her completely flustered face whose eyes peered in my own. She bit her lip as I hanged over her.

We remained in place, both abashed at the circumstance we were in. We both didn't move at all. By our reactions, we almost seemed to like this situation. Her radiant violet eyes seemed to convey a sense of warmth. I just sat there doing nothing but taking comfort in her presence. Comfort that was a bit too familiar.

The sickly girl's image appeared once more, this time she was faintly smiling as she laid in bed.

What the heck is this girl doing to my mind!

Snapping from my trance, I exclaimed, "Checkmate. I win!"

Scarlet's flustered face somehow glowed even more red as she shouted, "How did you beat me!?"

"Not so slick after all? You see…

"How did you beat me!?"

"Hold on, you just said that? What's going on?"

"How did you bea…!?"

The "Scarlet" in front of me dissolved into magical dust that was blown away by the breeze.

"Got you!"

I turned to see the real Scarlet joyfully swinging her bow right at me. NOT THE FACE!

Wham. I went flying as Scarlet's bow smacked me square in the jaw. I landed with a thud as I lay there defeated and outsmarted by this archer girl.

"Ow…"

Scarlet walked up to me and said whilst looking down. "Checkmate, I win."

Circe got up from her chair, thrilled by the match. "Bravo! Bravo! I haven't seen children fight like that in front of me for quite some time. I'm surprised you showed some wit with that little move of yours Koman."

"Thanks I guess." I said as I slowly propped myself up, face swollen from the hit.

"However, your companion Scarlet is certainly the more skilled of you two."

Scarlet began to rub the victory right in my face. "It was mind-numbing easy beating you with my trademark Facade. The ability create an effigy of myself whilst I sneaked up on your gawking self and won the match. After all, what makes you think I would just let you win and hold me down in such an awkward fashion?"

I hung my head in silent, too focused on the emotions that still racked my brain.

"You know... Scarlet, was it? I could always offer Koman's position in the guild to you anytime you want. Would you like that?"

"Thanks, not interested though. But, in the case I want to make this delinquent cry, I'll give you a call."

Breaking from my miserable defeat, I flared with renewed fire."OI! DON'T YOU DARE YOU TWO!"

Scarlet and Circe giggled. Circle continued. "Just joking Koman. That concludes my lesson with you. However, there's another tip I have..."  
Circe took off my glasses. My eyesight went from clear to a complete swirl of fuzz as she snatched my glasses.

"C'mon! Not cool Circe!" I am extremely far-sighted. That means if I was to not wear my glasses, everything close to me would be just a huge blurs of colors and outlines. Come to think about it, a close-quarters combat class like rogue is not the best choice for someone as far-sighted as me.

"He's blind as a bat without his glasses. Just for you to know if you ever need to keep Koman in line. Got that Scarlet?"

"I will be sure to abuse… I mean remember that little detail as best as I can."

"OI! I SWEAR!" I frantically clawed at Circe who held the glasses out of my reach.

Circe then gave me back my glasses upon making me suffer a bit. I grumpily looked at her, whose smug face smiled in response.

"I must really be off now. Oh I just remembered. Before I leave on official business though, I suggest forming an adventurer group for your little quest. You see..."

"Group?" we both asked.

Scarlet continued. "Look, it's been real nice meeting you and beating Koman up. Especially the last part. However, I only agreed to let this perverted degenerate accompany me. Not to recruit even more idiotic teammates."

"Oi, now it's perverted degenerate?"

"I did read your books after all. Their stories' plot isn't exactly wholesome by any means."

"For your primitive mind, those novels are the apex of writing prowess!"

"Oh I know. But after all, you want the location of the little item you showed me. right?"

"Yes…" Scarlet suddenly seemed a bit more reserved than before.

"Then you will follow my advice. Trust me. An adventurer's group is needed to reach the dangerous location of the item. I will even teleport you to where you need to go. What do you say?"

Circe's eyes glowed bright crimson red as she had her hands clapped together in anticipation.

Scarlet shifted uncomfortably at the new prospect offered to her. She appeared to not really have a choice.

Odd. Circe wouldn't offer help like this so casually. What was she up to? I nudged  
Scarlet's shoulder and turned to talk to her. "Well, I guess we have nothing to lose right Scarlet?"

Scarlet resignedly said. "Yeah. I do really need this. Though I'm not usually inclined for such quests. I will accept the advice I suppose."

She whispered in a quiet voice that was barely audible. "For Papa."

We both turned towards the delighted Circe who relayed us the terms of our agreement. After finishing her briefing, Circe tapped us both on the wrist, marking a magical emblem.

"A little something that will allow us to contact one another if needed. I will send you the information when you finish assembling your group. Good luck, my future in-laws!"

"IN-LAWS!"

The two of us were then teleported shortly in front of a shady alley after receiving Circe's terms.

I spotted a familiar trace of yellow and red in the corner of my eye. It dashed down the alley and through a door. Interesting…

I walked towards the colored trace as Scarlet followed me into the shady alley and onto the doorstep of a tavern bar. We stopped to go over our little side quest.

Scarlet stated, "Circe said we needed to find a priestess and a knight for our group. They should be somewhere here in the capital apparently."

"Why would we be teleported near a back alley then? Are we finding the knight first?"

"Only one way to find out, my degenerate assistant."

"Again with the degrading adjectives. Stop it would you?"

"Where would the fun be in that?"

We walked into a rusty tavern to see a plethora of rough, shady characters throughout the bar. All of them appeared to be hardened criminals who would probably fight to the death at the slightest insult.

The bar's inside was worn and torn from the bottom up. The reason why was probably due to the countless amount of bar fights that took place in the establishment.

There seemed to be a bar fight happening right now actually. In the center of the commotion, there was a blur of rose and magenta.

Men were flung across the room as this colorful blur seemed to pummel the living crap out of them with ease.

What type of hardened fighter could those be to dispatch bulky grown men so easily? Must be one hell of a man.

The fight settled down and revealed before us, was a short girl with in a royal gown. She had her short magenta and rose hair put together in a punk hairstyle.

"What the fuck?"

She proceeded to sit down with legs on the table after beating up what seemed to be a dozen of ponderous men, that were now unconscious on the floor. She then drank from a mug that was definitely too big for her. After slamming the mug violently on the table, she politely asked in a drunken tone, "Hic... another mug... hic... please?"

The quivering bartender arose from hiding behind the counter to nervously bring this rowdy girl her drink.

She began to indulge herself in the next mug with a clear drunken smile on her face.

"Hey, Koman?"

"Yeah?"

"You might want to see this…"

Scarlet held before me the picture of the people Circe sent us to find.

The paper displayed a tall dashing knight and an innocent young girl. A girl that happened to look exactly like the drunken female brawler before us. This was the priestess?

"What the double fuck?"


	13. Chapter 3 Part 3

**Part 3:**

Scarlet and I stood there astonished at the "priestess" chugging a beer mug before us. She seemed only about 13-14 years old by her looks. However, she appeared to chug more beer in a minute than the average man would ever dared in his entire life.

"Is that even legal for a little girl like that to drink?"

"I don't think it matters, considering she just dispatched a whole bar of men. Anyways Koman, I suggest we hasten through this side quest so I get the information I want, finish my trip, and finally say goodbye to you."

I exclaimed mockingly. "How outrageous! You still don't like me in the slightest?!"

"What was your first clue?"

We sat across this tipsy little priestess and began to try to strike up a conservation.

"Ahem. Hello miss, we are looking for…" I looked at the paper Circe gave us to find two titles on the bottom, one for the dashing knight and the _innocent_ girl. I read the title out aloud. "...I believe it was Cassandra Valentine, a prestiged priestess and the 2nd daughter of the Valentine royal family. Say what now?"

"Yep... hic... that's me! Are you the royal patrol coming to take me back to home? I was expecting them to come soon." She bore a grin that stretched across her beer smeared loli face. The girl than began chug once more from her mug.

Scarlet decided to play along with this priestess. "Fantastic! It just so happens that we are the royal patrol. Here. Let's help you get cleaned up and we will have you back in the royal palace in no time, your highness."

The girl started to bubble with rage as her rose and magenta hair began to glow. This isn't going to be good.

"BUT I DON'T WANT TO GO HOME! The royal patrol is always ruining my fun!" The girl then chucked her mug right at my face, knocking me out of my chair. OW.

Scarlet then got up out of her chair and pulled out her bow. The punk priestess clumsily dashed in and swung her fist in a wide arc before Scarlet come fire a shot.

"Buff Strength!" A number slot roll spun beside her. The roll stopped at the number 8. Huh?

Scarlet barely managed to block this magically infused blow from the flailing priestess and was flung back a few feet from the sheer force of the punch's contact on her bow.

"Welcome to assist anytime!" She yelled about me whilst I was on the floor in pain.

"Alright then!" I rubbed my head and got up only to meet the distressed priestess fling herself onto me.

"I just want to see my auntie! She promised me to visit me and help me check out hot guys!"

"GET IT OFF ME! OWOWOW!" I run around the worn bar room and tried to pry off this drunken brawler as she wrapped herself on my back.

She tore at my glamourous hair with her grimy little hands. MY HAIR!

"Get this gremlin off of me!" I said in a frenzy of panic.

The girl held her hands in the air like she was on a rollercoaster. "WEE! MORE! MORE!"

Scarlet constantly readjusted her aim as I ran around the room with the girl continuing to swing about. "HOLD STILL KOMAN! I CAN'T GET A CLEAR SHOT WITH YOUR GIANT HEAD IN THE WAY!"

"YOU TRY HAVING A LITTLE DEVIL ON YOUR BACK THEN!"

She continued to pull on my hair once more. "GO HORSEY GO!"

"Enough!" I backed in the wall, briefly disorienting this demon of a girl. The priestess fell off of my back.

I fell to my knees in distress, clutching my hair. "It took me so much hair product to put it together this morning… all wasted for nothing…"

"Cry about your edgy hair later Koman! Hold her down so I can get a shot with my net arrow."

The girl then stood up to activate another one of her abilities..She began to emit an intense magenta aura that radiated a sense of immense power. Crap.

"Buff resistance!" The slot machine rolled a one this time. The aura died down to a faint spark.

The mischievous priestess paused in dismay and shock. "Oh slime biscuits…"

"Got you. Snare!" Scarlet fired a magical net that pinned the little gremlin to the wall, immobilizing and restraining her limbs in the process.

With a thrilled face, Scarlet turned to me and said, "That wasn't too difficult. Wait. Are you crying Koman?"

I was sitting at a little shrine of mine, complete with a candle and a framed picture of me with my trademark hairstyle. "Hair… I shall mourn your loss. Your sacrifice shall not be forgotten."

Scarlet loudly exclaimed her surprise of my little shrine. "How conceited are you to have a framed picture of yourself!"

My signature hairstyle was now simply a torn up mess. "Scarlet, you just don't understand the loss I just suffered… Wait do you hear that?

We both turned to see the the once flamboyant priestess, snoring whilst restrained in Scarlet's net. What a first impression.

The girl woke up an hour late out of the net and sitting in a chair in front of us with her hands and legs tied. She seemed less drunk and bat-shit crazy now. Let's try this little conversation again.

"Alright, Miss Valentine, was it? We're not the royal patrol. I repeat to make sure you get it through your skull. We are not the royal patrol. My name is Koman and this is my lovely assistant Scarlet."

"Woah woah woah. If anyone's going to be the assistant, it would be you."

In a sarcastic voice, this little priestess responded, "Yep that... BURP… that's me. Cassandra Valentine. The divinely gifted princess and priestess of the "acclaimed" Valentine royal family. How can I… BURP… help you?

"We were assigned to bring you along to…"

"Let me stop you right there. I'm trying to… to... oh god, the beer's fighting back."

"Koman, get a bucket."

"Right."

The girl proceeded to puke magenta colored rainbows into the bucket I fetched. What was with fantasy worlds and their weirdly colored… everything I supposed? I wiped the beer-soaked "priestess's" face with a towel I fetched from the quivering bar-tender.

The priestess began to compose herself enough to talk. "Great… Is the royal patrol going to call in my sister? Tell her she sucks for sending in a bunch of overpaid babysitters to collect me. Took you long enough. I was about to make my way out of this capital."

I whispered into Scarlet's ear. "This is the priestess that we were suggested to recruit? Oh well. I guess it would be the same to drag her along as recruiting her. I'm sure Circe wouldn't mind."

"Hold on Koman, she's a royal figure. If we were to be caught dragging her off, we could be arrested."

"So, just seal her mouth shut and shove her in a box. No one would ever know."

"You truly are trash. Even if we did that, she would hold a grudge if we were to deliver her in such a terrible fashion. Though I really don't like the idea, we have to get her approval to come with us."

"Yeah! Listen to your girlfriend you twit!"

"You're the twit, you drunk hair assaulting brat!"

"Grrr!" We both butted heads against one another.

Scarlet separated us to cool the situation and questioned the girl. "You said that you wanted to see your auntie. Well the person we were tasked to recruit you was a mage named Circe.

The girl drastically changed her tone. "You know auntie Circe? Why didn't you say so? Let's get going then!"

"Whelp that was easy."

The priestess then narrowed her eyes in disbelief. "Wait... how do I know you were actually hired by Circe? You still could be the royal patrol after all. They're known for such tricks."

I just had to raise the flag. "No! You crazy royal pain in the ass! We are not the stupid royal patrol!"

"That's exactly what the royal patrol would say. Prove it!"

Scarlet and I revealed the emblems on our wrists that were given to us by Circe.

"Could be fake!"

"C'MON!"

"Look I'm not going anywhere until I'm thoroughly convinced that you were sent by Circe! That's final!"

I dragged my hands down my face in frustration. "Alright! Has Circe told you about her little "brother"?

"Of course! I was laughing so hard when Circe told the royal court about the idiot who went streaking on the town! It's been all the rage in the capital these days."

Damn it Circe! I swear that I'll put something nasty in your drink when I get back…

I poked the girl on the nose. "Well I just happen to be that same person, for better or for worse I don't yet know… And if she trusts me, so you should too."

"No way… I don't believe you. She said that her assistant got completely wasted and nude. You slim ass self looks like you never sipped beer in your life. Actually, you don't look like you amount to anything really..."

My eyebrows twitched uncontrollably as my patience was drawn to its limit. "I had enough, you insufferable loli! Scarlet, get me two mugs and a keg, and please unbind our _darling_ princess. I'm going to make her cry as I display her utter insignificance compared to a prodigy like me!"

Scarlet casually brushed aside her hair. "Really? You want to drink now? I suppose, if it shortens our time together, sure. Let me get the beer."

The priestess rebutted my exclamation. "Loli? Bring it on, lightweight! I have never lost before and I'm not going to start now! Let's have a drink off!"

"I am going to savor the royal tears you are about to shed. I can already picture your crying self as I shatter your pretty little reality."

The priestess got up to slap down a paper bill on the counter that made the bartender's eyes light in joy as he passed out. She then walked back to our table. "When I win, I going to keep you as my adorable, whiny pet. To give you a faint sense of hope, if I somehow don't win, I'll go along with your group. Deal?"

"Deal!"

Scarlet brought us two mugs and a whole keg. "I'm not cleaning up after you two. Drink as long as you're fine wallowing in your own filth. I'm going to check if there's any inns nearby to stay in. Try not to die okay? Later." She then left outside the bar.

Staring in each other's gleaming eyes, both eager to make the other cry, the princess and I exclaimed, "Ready? Three, two, one! DRINK!"

Then this little princess and I proceeded to drank to our heart's content.

At the cusp of sunset, Scarlet returned. "Hey guys I'm back and I found a place we can stay for the night… What the heck is going on?"

Scarlet returned to witness a drunk priestess and a half nude drunk me sprawled all over the floor, hallucinating heavily as we were beyond normal drunkenness.

"I… hic… win."

"No… hic… I win you dumb priestess."

We rolled over in slight agony as we had both drank an exorbitant amount of alcohol.

Scarlet tip-toe through the mess we made and sighed heavily. "It looks like you two drank an equally astounding amount of beer. Though Miss Valentine, you did lose the bet. Remember, drawing is the same as not winning. That means you're coming with us."

The priestess threw a tantrum on the floor."WHAT! I can't… hic... accept losing! Especially not to this scrawny plebeian."

Whilst attempting to put my shirt back on, I countered, "We could always just turn you in…I'm sure we can make a pretty dime doing so."

With utter reluctance, the priestess pouted in defeat. "True. Hmmm fine. I guess I'll tag along. Can't be worse than being holed up at home."

"Here, get up you two." Scarlet assisted our drunken bodies up and helped the two of us onto some chairs.

With her head held down in disappointed, Scarlet stated, "Immensely confounding to believe I am dealing with this crap right now. Anyways, you did say you were in hiding, right?

"Yep. The whole royal guard is patrolling the capital in search of me. Good luck getting me out of here."

"Great...How the hell am I supposed carry my two equally drunk and equally idiotic team members all the way to our inn without anyone noticing us?"

With a drunken smile, I answered, "I… hic… got an … hic… idea!"


	14. Chapter 3 Part 4

**Part 4:**

"Donations for the poor! Please donate to help these miserable souls! Look into your hearts and help these poor struggling orphans!"

Scarlet was wheeling us in a cart through the capital whilst asking for money. I brilliantly came up with the plan of acting as drunk orphans to avoid the royal guards.

Just as expected, the plan worked. Everyone turned their attention away from us and no one cared to pass us a glance. Even some of the so-called royal guards turned away. Should I be glad or concerned about this city's lacking in morality?

We then arrived at our inn, completely exhausted but unnoticed by the overwhelming waves of guards in search for our little priestess.

Scarlet checked us in for a small inn room on the second story.

The innkeeper handed Scarlet the keys to our room."Thank you ma'am. This way you two rapscallions." Scarlet politely nudged us two drunk souls up the stairs and into our room.

Once in the inn room, Scarlet asked if we wanted to take a bath first. To her surprise, she found us lying on the same bed, both half-awake. She murmured. "The things I do for you Papa."

I faintly heard the sounds of the running bath as I fell asleep beside this insufferable loli.

"Koman. Get up."

"Huh?"

I woke up in a small inn room, in a bed. One that happened to have this priestess snuggling beside me. Nothing new. Wait, why are we tied together though.

The priestess opened her eyes in shock. "Please tell me this is just a beer-induced hallucination." She then pinched my cheek.

"Ow." What is with this girl?

She began to scratch her cheek. "Oh slime biscuits. It's not a dream…"

After pausing for a few moments and realising the reality of the situation, we both shouted at Scarlet in frustration. "What the hell?!"

"Hehehe. I guess it was a fun idea to put the drunk darling couple together. After all, there's only two beds in this room, and I'm definitely not sharing a bed with one of you."

"Then explain to me why we are tied up again?"

"Because you two were one hell of a problem last night. Constantly throughout the night I had to get up and make sure you didn't drunkenly sleepwalk yourself out of the inn. Eventually, I decided to just tie you two together so I can finally get some sleep."

Scarlet then got out of bed and stretched her body out in a sleepy almost robotic fashion. She then began to write in her notebook of hers for a few moments.

Oh yeah… I forgot we were balls to the wall drunk yesterday…

I felt the heat rise beside me as the priestess's aura rose in intensity.

She began to throw a fit. "That's great and all, but that doesn't explain why we are still tied up!"

The priestess began to flail energetically to the point that she threw us off the bed.

We rolled all the way across the room and into a wall where I took the brunt of the impact.

"Oi. Can you not? Ow. My head hurts."

"Are you hurt? I would heal that injury. But sadly, I'M TIED UP WITH YOU!"

"Shush, you'll wake up the whole block." Scarlet walked up to us and with her short blade cut us free. We staggered to our feet as we were both still having a minor hangover.

"How the hell do you deal with this? My head can barely function with how disoriented I am right now."

Who knew something so easy as chugging beer would be so painful later on.

"With immense skill and practice! And..." The priestess flopped on the bed.

I helped her up.

"And a bit of magic. See for yourself. Cleanse Debuffs." The slot machine rolled a 7.

The priestess began to emit an aura around her and a radiant ring scanned her body from head to toe. The aura broke and the priestess seemed renewed as she confidently walked towards me.

All semblance of drunkenness or disorientation from her seemed to be gone.

"See. Easy."

I crossed my arms. "Great. Now, how about me then, your royal loliness Cassandra? Any time now would be fine."

"Fine. If you want it in such a rush. Maximum power."

Huh?

The slot began to roll slides with words instead of numbers. The slot eventually landed on Itching Plague? Oh no…

I began to panic as a overwhelming urge to scratch myself arose. I threw myself on the floor and started to desperately.

The priestess was laughing her butt off as I attempted to relieve myself of this discomfort.

Scarlet snickered in the background, watching the whole situation unfold without a single instance of showing any concern.

"Okay. Okay. I get it! Make her stop Scarlet!"

"It's your dilemma Koman. I got no say in this."

Really!?

The priestess crouched before my flailing self. "Are you sure you get it? I believe an apology is in order then? After all, I don't think calling a royal girl a loli is a nice way of addressing her. By the way, the name's Cassie for future reference. I hate royal titles."

The itch was getting worse by the second.

"Alright Cassie! I'm sorry okay? Now just please make it stop!"

"As you wish."

Cassie recited her spell and I was relieved of the immense itching that I just endured.

"Thanks for the help Scarlet."

Scarlet returned an uncaring smile. "You're welcome Koman."

Cassie then cleared her throat which prompted Scarlet and I to turn in her direction.

"Alright, so why exactly did you two come to recruit me?"

"Suppose we might as well brief her before moving on." Scarlet then sat down on her bed and began explaining the situation to our darling priestess.

"So… you want me to join your adventurer group for... why again?"

Scarlet patiently repeated herself. "Because "Auntie" Circe requested you join us in our little escapade to find a certain rare potion. Trust me, we wouldn't be here otherwise."

"Gee, thanks. And what makes you think I would join?"

Good point. Why would she join us?

Scarlet continued. "Wait, you did say you were trying to make you way out of the city right?"

"Yes little miss Detective. I was trying to sneak out of the city to visit my auntie. The royal patrol are searching the city right now to make sure I don't visit her. Not that I care. I was waiting in that pub for my adventurer group. They promised to show up hours ago… Another thing else?"

"So where's your so-called adventurer group?"

"You see… It turns out that…"

"Yes?"

"That... I was too good for them. Yeah that's it!"

My eyebrow raised in suspicion. The girl began to nervously scratch her cheek again.

"Really? Then explain why you were still waiting in the bar then?"

She began to scratch her cheek even faster. "Just so I rub my divinely gifted talents in their faces of course."

"Then display your divinely gifted ability to us right now."

She posed dramatically in defiance to our rejection of her claims. "Fine then you scrubs! Behold! HOLY NOVA!"

The slot machine spun beside her, landing on a 0. The radiant ring that formed around her died down to a little ring of smoke as we were left utterly indifferent.

"Ahem."

Cassie bubbled with absolute unbridled sass. "FINE SCRUBS! It turns out I can't control my magic. Are you two happy now!? You know like everyone else in the royal court that I am unable to conjure reliable spells."

The priestess pouted and curled up in a tempered ball of a girl as she turned away from us.

It seemed to be that our little priestess has a case of the RNG's. That is that she has a randomized chance to get a certain power level for the spells she uses. She also seems to be able to do the opposite where she chooses the power but not the spell. Interesting mechanic, though hopefully it won't backfire later on.

Scarlet casually brushed Cassie's pouting aside. "It's not that bad. At least you can use magic. This guy right here has shown little to no uses and I let him tag along."

"Oi. You don't have to tell everyone that I'm useless."

I leaped to tackle Scarlet but she dodged my futile attempts.

Cassie continued to pout. "Really? You would be fine with me in your group? Why?"

"Like I said, you can't be worse than Koman really. How about this? If you tag along, we will bust you out of the city, and we'll take you to Circe after we complete our quest. Fair?"

Scarlet said gritting her teeth as she sat on me who was flailing underneath her. Her face seemed to mimic that of a happy one but with serious constraint. It must be biting her on the inside to invite her I suppose.

Cassie ceased her pouting and turned in slight surprise. She stopped scratching her cheek as well. "As long as it's a kick-ass adventure in which we meet hot dudes on the way, you got me interested. So what now?"

Scarlet pulled out the paper that detailed the team members we needed to recruit.

"Apparently, we have one last member. A dragon knight that goes by the name Charles. Happen to know the fellow?"

Scarlet turned to show Cassie the page of the dashing knight that we needed to recruit.

"You got to be kidding me." Cassie said with her head held low.

"Huh?" Scarlet and I both said.

"I know where to find just such a person. I don't know why auntie Circe would want you two to have him on your team though."

I then calmed down enough to respond. "Then it's settled. Let's get going shall we? But first, GET OFF OF ME SCARLET!"

"Okay, my degenerate assistant." Scarlet casually stood up and leaned against the wall, looking at me with a smug face that is a bit too familiar now.

I got up and brushed the dust off my outfit as I glared back at Scarlet.

"But first things first, I suggest we eat and get dressed. I got you guys some take out and clothes to change into yesterday whilst you two were drunk and asleep. There's probably still guards around the city searching for Cassie after all."

Scarlet revealed two tattered cloaks and what looked to be a few rice dishes with pork.

We took a brief intermission to eat as Cassie and I ravenously ate our breakfasts since we didn't eat dinner yesterday.

Whilst shoving my face with rice and pork, I looked out the window and towards the scenery outside the homely old inn we were in. The capital city seemed to be even more vibrantly beautiful than the town I was dropped in as it glistened with a splendor of a beautiful jewel. I could see the winding narrow streets go on forever as the city stretched as far as the eye could see.

What an interesting world this is at times.

After getting dressed in our tattered brown cloaks, Cassie pranced towards the door of the room after taking my necklace.

"Swipe! C'mon you two. I want to see Circe as soon as possible."

Cassie was already making her way down the hall as we rushed to catch up with her.


	15. Chapter 3 Part 5

**Part 5**

Wait!

Scarlet and I rushed down the hall as we pursued this mischievous priestess. She is definitely more trouble than she's worth.

"Get back here you loli!"

"The name's Cassie. And good luck catching up!"

Cassie pranced along as I sprinted to tackle her annoying self into the ground.

Cassie suddenly stopped right before the stairs and stuck out her foot, which I proceeded to trick over.

I tumbled down the stairs, wrapping myself in the tattered cloak of mine. Scarlet watched, giggling from the top of the stairs.

Ow.

Cassie then leaned over to taunt me as I slowly got up.

"Fufufu. Too stupid to notice? Of course you are silly."

I then used Shadowstep to appear beside her, much to her surprise.

"Eh?!"

I then pinched her cheek as I tried to get back my silver heart necklace.

"Eh? OWOWOW! Stop it!"

"Give me back that necklace." I was not going to let this gremlin mess up any more of my stuff, especially not that necklace.

"NEVER!"

We began to fight like children over my necklace in the main lobby of this rustic little inn.

The passer-bys began to notice our little commotion.

"What is the cruel man doing?"

"I think he's trying to take that poor girl's necklace. What a barbarian!"

Cassie then looked at me with devious eyes. Shit. She's going to play the helpless little child card. Second only to the gender card.

"Fufufu. HELP! HELP! This man is trying to steal my necklace. PLEASE SIR NOT MY NECKLACE! IT'S THE ONLY BELONGING FROM MY FAMILY I HAVE LEFT! I WILL GIVE YOU ANYTHING ELSE! EVEN IF IT MEANS GIVING YOU MY BODY!"

I panicked as disgusted looks around me started to crush my soul. Cassie grinned at me, knowing the effect of her words.

Not again. Though this necklace was worth more than my dignity. It always has been...

I pinched harder. I'm not going to yield this time.

"Owowow!"

"Not going to work. Let the necklace go. Trust me, I have an unbreakable grip."

Despite my below average strength, I was reigning arm-wrestling champion on my track team for simply just crushing my competition's hands until they were weak enough to beat.

"FINE! Just stop pinching my cheek!"

Cassie sighed as she relented and gave me the necklace. I promptly put the necklace back on my neck. I looked around to see the looks of disgust intensified as people began to whisper amongst themselves about us. Great…

"What's so important about that necklace anyways?"

I then glared at her with an intensity that would scare even the most dauntless of people. "Everything. You little loli. Now don't try that again." She pouted in silent defeat.

I looked up to see Scarlet nod in slight approval. "Are you two done yet? Let's get going." Scarlet slid down the stairs' rail and proceeded to open the door for Cassie and I.

After our little incident, Cassie directed us down a few streets to a main plaza with a clock tower in the center.

It looked almost like a train station, actually, with its waiting benches before a track and crowds of people.

We waited as what seemed to be an train rolled to a stop before us. There didn't seem to be any wheels as the box contraption floated several inches above the track. A swirl of energy enveloped the transport. "Judging by your faces, you two haven't been around in the capital city of Lumieres right?"

Cassie prompted us to step into the vehicle as the door shut close behind us. The inside also reminded me of a train car, just with a 1800's stagecoach theme to it. It even had poles to hold on to inside and seats to sit down on.

The train then prompted to move at a relatively fast speed. Almost as fast as one from home.

I looked out the window and saw a splendorous array of colors whizzed by as the train hurried along.

Every house, every tree, every nook and cranny of the city blurred into one continuous strand of motion as we traveled down into the heart of the dazzling bright city. Looking upon the city had the sense of immersion like one visiting a new, yet familiar place.

It really reminded me of home. I miss Japan...

I turned to see Scarlet equally as fascinated as she vigorously drew and wrote in her notebook. This must be a new sight for any person of this realm.

I was feeling a bit inquisitive. "Where exactly are we Cassie?"

Cassie responded with the utmost enthusiasm. "As you can see, we are in Lumieres, the city of innovation and the future. It is home to the leading inventors and scientists of the nation. Even nations like Belzerg and Elroad pale in comparison to our nation Alexandria's affluence of culture, technology, and wealth. And who's the lovable princess of such a realm?"

Cassie put an adorable smile and her face as she struck a pose with two peace signs. If only she knew how overused and basic that was…

"Anyways we are here. The Lumieres Magical Academy for Gifted Individuals."

Scarlet and I looked out to see the train stop in front of what appeared to be an academy.

A magical knight academy? Oh boy. That certainly sounds familiar. I wonder why.

We walked out of the transport and towards the gleaming academy gates where we were stopped by two fully armored guards.

"Halt! We are going to need some identification please. You three hoodlums don't look anything like the students allowed on these premises."

Cassie threw her cloak into my arms and struck an impatient pose. What a drama princess.

"Identification eh? How's about your damn future ruler?"

The guards instantly fell to their knees.

"Pardon us Lady Valentine. We couldn't tell it was you under that cloak. We apologize.

"You are right to be sorry. Calling your princess a hoodlum. Anyways, I'm taking my friends here with me into the academy. Don't alert the royal authorities or I will have you two locked up forever. Do I make myself clear, you sacks of human trash?"

An dark magenta aura formed around her that tinged the air with an intense heat.

The guards continued to prostrate before her. "Crystal clear madam!"

The aura then died down. "Fufufu. It's always fun doing that. C'mon." Cassie then signalled Scarlet and I to follow her. I threw off my cloak, not that we didn't need it. Scarlet did so as well.

I walked along with my mind still confused at the sudden change of tone Cassie presented. She seemed to be a lot scarier now.

As we walked into the academy gates and into the courtyard, we noticed a plethora of students chatting, practicing spells, and doing homework. I even tried to flirt with some of the campus girls before being dragged off by Scarlet and Cassie. Emphasize on the try. Good times.

So this is what magical high school looks like. Pretty boring actually.

Other than the cute fantasy uniforms, it's basically just high school with magic as the concept of homework instead of trigonometry. How fun...

Cassie then guided us past the center of the academy into what seemed to be a packed training arena. There we saw two knights sparring. One knight was in gleaming gold armor and the other was in blue armor. The gold armored knight easily dispatched the blue knight and raised his arms to receive the cheers of the crowd.

Scarlet nudged Cassie. "So which one is the guy we are looking for?"

I interjected. "Probably the gold armor knight."

"I would honestly say the blue armor knight. Seems just as much of a loser as you."

"Hey. Well the gold knight seems to be just as arrogantly rude as you."

Cassie tapped my shoulder as I was about to get into yet another verbal fight with Scarlet. "Actually, you two are both wrong. It's the knight on the bench."

Huh?

On the bench alone, sat a knight in red and white. He seemed to be fervently cheering the two knights on.

"Charles! Get your butt over here!"

The red and white knight jumped to his feet startled and promptly ran to us. He knelt once he got to us as he seemed exhausted from running that short distance.

He took off his helmet to reveal his prince charming like face and white hair. Fabulously short white hair. Up close, he was about an inch or two taller than me.

And by the looks of it, his hair didn't take any hair product. Lucky.

"We need to talk for a second, Charles."

Charles nervously knelt before Cassie. "Of course, Miss Valentine, the prestigious priestess and 2nd daughter of the renowned Valentine household."

"Always with the titles… Charles here has been somewhat of a childhood… bother. Our noble families have been close acquaintances for generations now. Though, I would personally like to have to hang out with anyone that's less… Charles than him. Anyways, Charles this is Scarlet and Kopan. Scarlet and Kopan this is Charles."

"It's Koman…"

"Ple-ple-pleasure to meet your acquaintances!" The knight anxiously shook Scarlet's and my hand. What a queer guy.

"So that settles the ice-breaker. So Charles…"

"Hey Cassie!

"Oh brother. This guy."

The golden knight approached our group. When he finally strutted his way over to us, I noticed that he had a gleaming rapier that had a design way too impractical and over-the-top to be useful. Potential noble brat inbound.

"Did you miss me? I see that you ditched the royal guards again to come by to watch my talented self." The gold knight then took off his helmet and flexed his muscles. He looked every bit the brat I perceived him to be. Even had the short stature to go with it as he was a bit shorter than Cassie.

"Ew, no you scrub. I was just here to talk to Charles."

"And who are these chumps. Oh where are my manners. I'm Xavier Romanoff, the new transfer student. Though, I am already the top student at this academy and sexiest man alive. Right Cassie?"

The knight seemed to nudge uncomfortably close as Cassie pushed him away in disgust.

Transfer student? Best one? Sexiest man alive? This Xavier fellow seemed one of those basic B-rated light novel types. I mean, he's an over-powered chump going to what is essentially is a high school. Can't go any lower than that in the basic levels of main character writing.

"Alright, as much as I would like to see Little Miss Entitlement suffer, I'm going to ask you to leave us alone. We are dealing with something right now."

The gold knight pushed me back in response. "Oh, what a tough guy act you're pulling. How about you bugger off with your quiet girlfriend and Charles the Timid over here okay? Speaking of Charles, way to cheer us on!"

"Thanks… Xavier. I was actually cheering on..."

"That's thanks Xavier the Handsome to you, you useless knight. I still can't believe they let you in this academy." The knight began to bug Charles, who shrunk under the barrage. I almost felt bad to see a guy get bullied by someone 2-3 heads shorter than him.

Scarlet addressed with a level-headed mindset. "I believe he doesn't want to discuss with you now. I don't think anyone ever wanted talk with short pompous filth like you."

Freaking roasted.

I added to Scarlet's comment. "Go bother someone your size okay? Charles shouldn't be bullied by a short brat like you."

The gold knight discarded Scarlet's comment with a clear expression of pain on his face from her stinging remark.

The knight instead approached me. "And you? Just who exactly is the nobody standing before me telling me what to do." He snickered fakely as he finished his question, as if to compensate for his losses.

I had enough of this brat. Time to put him in his place. "The more important thing is who's the idiot standing in front of me?"

"Huh?"

"As far as I can analyze, you're a generic 15-year old piece of garbage who just transferred into what basically screams rich kids. After you begged your mommy and poppy to cheat the system so you could join the academy, you promptly bought the most expensive and most impractical gear money could buy. I mean look that sword. It's ridiculous!"

"Well you are…"

"But wait there's more! Once your need to compense was met, you proceeded to use your bought overstated items and underhanded methods to fill your ever-growing skill deficit. A deficit made apparent as you swing a sword like a child swings their arms in the air. Absolutely pathetic. Oh, and I bet you paid that guy to lose just so you can get the cheers from the crowd right?" I shouted across the arena towards the blue knight.

The blue knight desperately shook his head in disagreement, guilty as charged.

" Correct me if I'm wrong, the most esteemed and worthless Xavier Moneybags."

Much to my surprise, Xavier, with tears in his eyes, broke down. He violently shouted some insults and ran off crying. That serves him right for thinking he's better than a genius like me.

Scarlet, Cassie, and this knight Charles all looked at me in awe.

"What?"

Scarlet sarcastically commented on my act of questionable heroism. "Didn't strike you as the gallant white knight type Koman. Way to stand up for Charles."

"Oh believe me, my pride…" I was then suddenly lifted in the air. Can't breathe.

"I can't believe you just stood up to him like that! No one has ever standed up to Xavier so dauntlessly before. Can I get your autograph? Wait, I don't have a pen on me. It doesn't matter. Thank you so much sir!" He swung me left and right like a teddy bear.

"Sure. That's great! Just let me down please."

Charles then enthusiastically placed me down as I gasped for air.

Scarlet commented with a smile. "Having fun?"

"Shut it."

"So, what are you kind folks here for? I'm sure Cassie wouldn't just come to say hello with friends. Would you?" His face shot up in glee.

Cassie pushed Charles in playful fashion. "Certainly not by any chance Charles. Only scrubs would think that."

Scarlet cleared her throat and began to explain. "You see we are going on a quest.

Charles' eyes shot up at Scarlet's statement. "I'm… I'm in."

"Wait hold on. Did I hear...?"

"I'm in... I know it's a bit hasty, but I'm in."

Scarlet began to scratch her head in confusion. "Don't you want to hear the reason behind it?"

"No, thank thank you kindly miss."

"Not at all?"

"Not not at all. You said you're going on a quest. As a dragon knight and a hero at heart, I-I am compelled to answer the call of adventure whenever it arrives. No matter how mysterious or perilous it is. Besides, I haven't exactly got any opportunities to participate in school quests as I'm the… the..."

Cassie interrupted. "The most quirky and timid knight of the school. Explains why you are always alone at lunch."

"Yeah..."

Can it be that easy? At this point in this world, it's best not to question. I did fly through the sky via loli banner so why not…?

Scarlet clapped her hands and smiled with an obviously fake smile that somehow only I noticed. "That's fantastic! Let's be on our way shall we?"

Whilst we were walking out of the arena, I made a horrible error in talking to Cassie. "Can't join adventurer groups? You two share one thing in common after all. How cute."

Cassie then pounced on me with a fury to match that of a little sister.

"Take this you scrub! Don't you ever dare to compare me to Charles!" She pulled at my hair as I struggled to get her off of me.

"Not the hair!"

Charles nervously peered at the conflict from behind Scarlet. "Hum, should we stop them?"

With an evil smile, Scarlet reassured Charles. "Nah. It's more entertaining just to watch. Trust me."

Many tore strands of hair later, Cassie finally cooled down enough for Scarlet to convinced her to stop.

Why is it always the hair!

We then made our way to the academy gates. To find an entire regiment of armored guards blocking the exit.

"There's the princess! Come out with your hands in the air and beer mugs right where we can see them! You all are under arrest for the kidnapping of Miss Valentine."

Crap. Beer mugs?

Cassie casually turned to us and said. "I wonder just who was the idiot who reported us 'kidnapping' the princess."

We turned around to see a snickering gold knight with a glowing symbol on his wrist, maniacally laughing on us in the background.

"Jokes on you! Now's who's the idiot huh punk? Have fun going to prison!"

Cassie and Scarlet both scolded me. "You just had to insult the privileged brat now did you?"

"What? It felt pretty good. You would honestly do the same."

The slightly scared guards began to inch their way towards us.

And like that, my crew of mysterious archer girl, a crazy loli princess, and a meek knight found ourselves in one hell of a pickle.


End file.
